Hi St3v3k4hn,
You are correct that many of the “bed-in-a-box” options (without latex as you don’t like that feel) would be cautioned for those in a higher BMI range. Those in a higher BMI range want to be especially prudent in the choice of their components. For those in a higher BMI range, there is more information about selection a mattress in the durability guidelines here. Specifically,
If your BMI is 30 or higher:
Higher BMI ranges will need more durable materials and components in a mattress and in a BMI range of 30 or higher I would include any 1.8 lb polyfoam or 4 lb memory foam as a “lower quality/density” material (relative to a higher BMI only) and minimize their use to a total of “about an inch or so or less” in the mattress.
Polyurethane foam: If your mattress is one sided then I would look for 2.0 lb per cubic foot density or higher. If the mattress is two sided then I would use a minimum density of 1.8 lbs per cubic foot or higher.
Memory foam (or gel memory foam): If your mattress is one sided then I would make sure that any memory foam is at least 5 lb per cubic foot. If the mattress is two sided then I would use a minimum density of 4 lbs per cubic foot.
There is a good synopsis of the basics of memory foam here.
You would probably be better off considering companies who aren’t necessarily one-size-fits-all companies, but instead manufacturers who can offer various memory foam products of which some can use higher quality foams that are more appropriate for your situation.
You can look online and use the experience and expertise of the members listed in post #21 here who are all very experienced and knowledgeable and specialize in providing the type of help and guidance on the phone that can help you make good choices. There are a wide range of memory foam and other options included in the choices there and I believe that all of them compete well with the best in the industry in terms of their quality, value, service, and transparency.
Their detailed knowledge of their mattresses and how they fit with different body types, including high BMIs, and sleeping positions along with your feedback from local testing, a customer base of many people that they can use as reference points, and any exchange, return, or any options they have available to customize a mattress after a purchase can help lower the risk of an online purchase. These online retailers or manufacturers can also be a good “value reference” for local purchases to make sure that if you are paying a “premium” for a local purchase (in exchange for the kind of “in person” guidance, service, and value that comes with dealing with a local retailer that can help you make more “accurate” choices that you have tested in person) is not too high.
In addition to the online members of the site listed in the previous membership link … post #12 here has some of the better online memory foam options for those who are looking for a memory foam mattress.
Please let us know how you progress!
Phoenix