The height difference between the two cores is very slight, maybe a 1/4" or so. It is enough for me to notice with the sheets though. That along with the stark difference in density leads me to contemplate keeping the 32 ILD core.
You are correct, we are both back and side sleepers. I tend start out on my back but I get the urge to sleep on my side. My wife starts out on her back with her head tilted to the side.
My wife is 125lbs and 5â8. I am 155 lbs and 5â11. She has broad shoulders for a woman and are as wide as mine. We both have very narrow waists. The difference is that she has very wide âbirthingâ hips that are heavy. For my wife, her main concerns I believe are pillow issues (head too high or head too low) because of the upper back pain when things are not right. She also tends to not like change, so she says she likes whatever sheâs used to at the time even if its not perfect. My issue is that I donât have a lot of padding in my hips and shoulders so I tend to get numbness when the mattress is too firm. Also, I get pain in my shoulder blade if my shoulders get crunched. I am looking for the right firmness that I sometimes find at certain hotels, where I donât toss and turn.
I can try to summarize and throw out the experience with the weak bed foundation.
28 ILD topper + 32 ILD core
Way too firm. Poor alignment along with numbness in shoulder and hips. Bad shoulder blade pain from shoulder being scrunched. Tossing and turning all night. Pictures of the alignment from the side show that the waste dips down so the spine looks like a U.
28 ILD topper + 28 ILD core
Still too firm.
19 ILD topper + 32 ILD core
We wouldnât want to go any firmer than this combination. It feels pretty good on my back. For both my wife and I, the pictures of the side sleeping position show that the spine is still dipped and is not straight. My wife sleeps decently on her back but she says she still tosses and turns at night. The firmness allows her head to be at the right angle since her shoulder doesnât sink in as much. I end up tossing and turning since I canât stay on my side for too long. If I had to sleep on this mattress, it isnât the most uncomfortable thing in the world but I am trying to look for something that provides better spinal alignment.
19 ILD topper + 28 ILD core
The pictures of the alignment from the side show that the alignment is almost perfectly straight for both my wife and I. In fact, we would only want to go slightly softer than this. Pictures of the alignment of back sleeping are good as well. The bed feels comfortable for my wife and I. My wife says she still tosses and turns a little bit, but less than with the 19/32 combination. Her complaint was that the pillow was too high now that her shoulder sinks down more. Her head ends up tilting upwards. She is trying a lower pillow tonight. I didnât toss and turn much in this configuration but I did wake up with a little numbness since I slept so long in one position. If I could ask for any more, I would want my shoulder to sink in a slight bit more. In general, I think we would want a configuration that is very similar to this (if not a tiny, tiny bit softer) for both my wife and I. For the cost to send the 32 core back and ship a 28 core, itâd pay for part of the additional topper. In your opinion, how would the additional topper compare?
Thanks for the help.
Hi rapscalli0n,
Thanks for the updated feedback ⌠and it certainly added to my clarity about what you are experiencing.
From the sounds of it and based on your feedback it sounds to me like the 19/28 combination is close to the ideal for both of you. Itâs just very slightly firmer at the moment which is good because if anything it will soften slightly over the course of the first 90 days or so as the bed and cover breaks in and you also adjust to a new sleeping surface. I donât think if I was in your shoes I would add a topper to this at all and I think you would be risking alignment issues if you added more softness/thickness to this combination.
Itâs not uncommon at all that you will need a new pillow when you buy a new mattress which can change the height between your head and neck and the mattress and this is just a normal part of any change in your sleeping system.
What kind of mattress protector or sheets to you have? Some mattress protectors can change the amount you sink into the mattress and if a mattress protector or sheets are too tight they can also create a âdrumâ effect which can reduce the amount you sink in to the mattress.
It may be worth trying to unzip the cover on 3 sides and sleeping on it without the cover compressing the latex to see if that softens it up enough to make the last bit of difference. This would give you some indication of what it may feel like as both the cover and the latex loosen or soften up a little.
I personally wouldnât add a topper when you are this close and at most I would add a soft mattress pad (such as a down alternative or something similar) if you need just a touch more surface softness and a bit more relief on pressure points but I would wait before doing this as well to give both the mattress and you to go through the initial break in and adjustment period.
I would also talk with Ken to ask his thoughts as well because a voice conversation can often pick up on details and nuances that written communication doesnât but from the sounds of it I think you are very close.
Phoenix
We currently donât have a mattress protector but I have the Luna waterproof mattress protector on order. This would probably firm up the bed. We have normal cotton sheets but they are deep fitted and loose. I can try sleeping with the sides unzipped.
Part of the issue is that we only have 1 side that has the 28 core. The other has the 32 core. I was contemplating on evening out the differences between the sides by making both sides a 32 core and adding comfort layer thickness to mimic the 19/28 combination. Do you think it would be far off? Thereâs the cost and hassle of exchanging the 32 core. I also read that it is better to try to make a hard bed softer but almost impossible to make a soft bed firmer. I wanted options in the future in case our bodies/preferences change.
Appreciate the inputâŚ
Hi rapscalli0n,
Given your feedback and that the 28/19 combination is very close (perhaps just a little too firm) I think it would be much riskier adding a topper to the 32/19 combination than it would to exchange the core. The upper layers of a mattress perform a different function than the lower layers and primary support (which is the job of the deeper layers which âstopâ the heavier parts of your body from sinking in too far) and secondary support (which is the job of the upper layers that form the pressure relieving cradle and fill in the gaps in your sleeping profile with lighter support to help maintain the natural curves of the spine) are related but different functions. If you did decide to use the 32 ILD cores then you would likely only need a very thin layer on top to isolate you just a bit more from the firmness of the support layers but there is always a risk in trying a combination that you havenât tried in person and the extra thicknes of the comfort layers may allow your heavier parts to âtravelâ too far before they are stopped even though they will âallowâ your shoulders to sink in more.
Youâre right that itâs easier to âfixâ a mattress that is too firm than it is to âfixâ a mattress that is too soft (either in the support layers or in the thickness/softness of the comfort layers) but this doesnât really apply as much to a mattress with a zip cover where the layers can be replaced individually instead of replacing the complete mattress ⌠and based on your feedback your mattress is âjust a littleâ on the firm side anyway and doesnât appear to be too soft.
The other difference with adding a topper is that you would lose the benefit of sleeping on the wool quilting layer that is in the cover in terms of temperature regulation and it may be a bit warmer.
Phoenix
I am glad I read this post as I am in the market for a latex mattress and had NO idea of all the complexities involved in the purchase of latex. Thanks for getting me started!
Hi aaronmi,
In most cases a comfort choice is fairly simple and straightforward with an online or a local purchase. For online a phone call and a more detailed conversation about your circumstances and criteria (along with the results of any testing you have done) that leads to a standardized layering for that manufacturer that works well on average for most people with a similar body type and sleeping positions. For a local purchase its mostly about choosing a mattress that is tested carefully and objectively for PPP (Posture and alignment, Pressure relief, and Personal preferences). In both cases making sure that all the materials are good quality is also important so you know that there are no weak links in the mattress and you can have a reasonable expectation that what you chose will be durable enough to still fit your needs and preferences years down the road.
The only real difference with an online purchase is that the risk is higher and your options after a purchase need to be taken into account so that you are comfortable with the recourse you have if you donât make the most suitable choice or donât fit the âaveragesâ of other people with similar body types and sleeping styles.
Once you get past the point of basic information and start analyzing specs, learning mattress theory and design, or overthinking things it can become amazingly complex and can often lead to a very steep learning curve, information overload, and sometimes âparalysis by analysisâ. Mattress design is partly an art and partly a science and itâs always much easier to âwork with the expertsâ than trying to become one yourself. Of course there are always those (such as me) that mattress theory and design and how different materials and designs interact with different people is an endless source of fascination and involves a never ending learning process but for most people this type of complexity is completely unnecessary and probably counterproductive. the more complex parts of the process are usually only necessary for the exceptions where the more common choices donât seem to apply.
Like so many other things ⌠the KISS principle applies and âjust enoughâ information to be actively involved in the process is the ideal and either too much or too little information can both lead to less than ideal choices.
Good luck with your research and if you have questions along the way donât hesitate to post them here ⌠and Iâm looking forward to finding out what you end up choosing.
Phoenix