WE (yes “we”) need some help in saving the best part of a brand new marriage… We just got married and my wife HATES my bed!! Here are the details:
I am a former football player with over 15 back surgeries. I sleep on my back with my feet up.
I’m 6’3’ and weigh 290 and am 60 years old.
For the past 12 years I have slept on a Select Comfort Air Bed (Their superior product) and it has worked fine for me.
I also travel a lot and the “Marriott” bed is a comfortable bed to me for traveling.
My wife is 5’5" and is petite and sleeps all over the bed
She just hates this air bed! She says find another mattress quickly or she will find the other bedroom…
She says that she just can’t get in and out of the bed and it isn’t comfortable and she is constantly changing her “number” all to no avail…As we all know, no sleep makes new brides…well it makes them not happy.
Because of my back problems and the fact that it will get worse, we have agreed to get an adjustable split king bed. We have agreed to follow the advice of the “experts” in mattress world. We have read the articles but we still can’t make a decision…so now it is up to me to do the right thing.
I need to make some decisions quickly because I want to keep the honeymoon going…Please give us some advice on the right mattress and the best place to buy it. The bed is a important piece to our home and we are willing to pay to get the best. (We are located in SC). Help me to find the happy face!!
The first place to start is the tutorial post here which has all the information, steps, and guidelines you will need to make the best possible choices … and avoid the worst ones. When you get to step 3 (and are ready to start testing mattresses) then if you let me know your city or zip I’d be happy to let you know of any of the better options or possibilities I’m aware of in your area. The tutorial post also has links to two lists that include some the online manufacturers or retailers that that are among the better online options if you are comfortable with an online purchase and you know the types of materials or mattress each of you prefer.
You can see some of my thoughts about airbeds in this article and your new wife’s complaints are not unusual.
There are too many variables, unknowns, and preferences involved to use any kind of “formula” or “theory at a distance” for anyone to be able to predict or know with any certainty what specific mattress will work best for someone else (see mattress firmness/comfort levels in post #2 here) so most of the information here will be about “how” to find your best options rather than what to specifically buy (which only you can decide). As “urgent” as your situation may be … making decisions too quickly under the pressure of the circumstances could easily make your situation even worse.
There is also more information about various ways that can help accommodate the different needs of a couple with different body types or sleeping styles in the first part of post #2 here but a good retailer or manufacturer will be knowledgeable about these types of challenges and the knowledge and experience of the retailer or manufacturer you deal with can be one of the most important parts of a successful mattress purchase.
The adjustable bed thread here also has more information and some good sources or reference points for “value” that will be helpful in deciding on an adjustable bed. I would keep in mind that an adjustable bed is more of a commodity and doesn’t have to be purchased as a “set” with any particular mattress. They all perform similar functions and can be purchased separately from the mattress. The mattress will be the most important part of your purchase.
I would also make sure that the two of you go together when you test mattresses locally because each person’s needs and preferences in terms of PPP (Posture and alignment, Pressure relief, and Personal preferences) are unique and a couple should always test mattresses together to make sure that the mattress works well for both of them when they sleep together (which can be very different from how a mattress feels for an individual person).
I apologize for not explaining on our earlier post that we have been out looking at many different types of mattresses in this area without finding anything close to being a clear “winner”. It is so hard to get a good feeling in a store when you basically have minutes to make a decision while a salesman is hovering over you hoping that you are his next commission check. I agree with your advice on the adjustable bed. So far it looks like Leggett and Platt seem to make the best adjustable bed that we have seen locally. Is there something better that we should look at online? We are in the Myrtle Beach area of SC and we aren’t sure if what we are looking for resides here. A few weekends ago we were in the mall and stepped into the Select Comfort shop. They gave us all kind of mumbo jumbo that for just $6500 they can solve our problems in the bed department. So we left and laughed, glad that we had found your webpage. They got me once but it won’t happen again.
We have also read through all of your buying advice online and have done our best to understand the business and who to buy from and who not to even think about going to see. So in the end we are trying to do the right thing so that I don’t end up with a mistake that ends up in the guest room. So please tell us who to see locally or should we make a weekend trip to a larger city somewhere nearby?
The adjustable bed thread I linked earlier which has more information about how different adjustable beds compare and some good sources for reference (or for an online order).
Some of the better options and possibilities I’m aware of in the region in and around Myrtle Beach, SC are included in post #4 here.