Hi @kylemore, I’m in the same area as you and just went through this so feel your frustration! We’re pretty saturated with the mass market options here. This post from 2011 about local places isn’t too up to date but some links are still valid, so you could review and see if anything up your alley is still operating.
I found visiting SleePare useful in understanding what types of things we like and don’t like in a mattress overall, as they do have a good variety of different types of mattresses to try, even if mostly focused on high marketing bed in box brands. Their salespeople aren’t at all helpful in getting you info in the TMU shopping guide, but the showroom does have some reasonable options from Brooklyn Bedding and I’d say Winkbed also–if you contact their customer service, they seem prepared to share densities and coil counts and such. But try broadly to really gain the knowledge of your own preferences.
I also visited Saatva, and if you’re thinking about latex you could look at Naturepedic up in Rockville (although they are coy about specs and pretty $$$, so we didn’t go with them, but the visit was very useful in establishing our preferences). I wish Warehouse Showrooms in Alexandria (which otherwise focuses on well-crafted solid wood furniture) would partner with some of the small VA makers like CozyPure instead of just selling the S-brands. I didn’t try them, but local VA maker and TMU member Winndom has products at a retailer in Warrenton (still a long drive but doable in a day).
Like you we were loathe to buy without trying, but we did end up purchasing out of state and having the mattress shipped to us. Following the TMU guide helped us really understand our needs and preferences and brought us to a very narrow set of what we really were in the market for. And combined with some sort of comfort adjustment/return guarantee (and desire for better pricing) we felt confident enough to buy online after all that. We felt at the end of the day that a full night’s sleep is the real test of the mattress more than the 20 minutes in the store.
I wasn’t up for the road trip to Fredericksburg or Richmond but it’s an option for some other choices if you have car access. Pottstown PA could also be an overnight road trip (~4hrs drive) to TMU member Magic Sleeper, who was one of our finalists. Might be worth the trouble if you’re really in a bind and feel more strongly than we ended up about showroom trials. (But only after doing all the TMU steps locally to really understand your own preferences first!)