Share a bed with my S/O. I sleep on my side, she sleeps on her stomach. What are our best options?

We’ve had a memory foam mattress topper for 6+ years now, so we’re used to that and prefer to have a memory foam mattress, but are definitely open to options. We’re trying to stay in the $750 price range but will extend the budget a bit if it is worth it.

Please let me know if there is any other information that you need from me. I am completely new to looking for an actual good mattress and not some cheap $300-$400 mattress. Thank you in advance.

Hi AliMusa,

Welcome … and I’m glad you found us :slight_smile:

While I can certainly help with “how” to choose … It’s not possible to make specific suggestions or recommendations for either a mattress, manufacturers/retailers, or combinations of materials or components because the first “rule” of mattress shopping is to always remember that you are the only one that can feel what you feel on a mattress. There are just too many unknowns, variables, and personal preferences involved that are unique to each person to use a formula or for anyone to be able to predict or make a specific suggestion or recommendation about which mattress or combination of materials and components or which type of mattress would be the best “match” for you in terms of “comfort”, firmness, or PPP (Posture and alignment, Pressure relief, and your own Personal preferences) or how a mattress will “feel” to you or compare to another mattress based on specs (either yours or a mattress), sleeping positions, health conditions, or “theory at a distance” that can possibly be more reliable than your own careful testing (hopefully using the testing guidelines in step 4 of the tutorial) or your own personal sleeping experience (see mattress firmness/comfort levels in post #2 here).

I’m not sure what you’ve read since you found the site but just in case you haven’t read it yet … the first place to start your research is the mattress shopping tutorial here which includes all the basic information, steps, and guidelines that can help you make the best possible choice … and perhaps more importantly know how and why to avoid the worst ones.

Two of the most important links in the tutorial that I would especially make sure you’ve read are post #2 here which has more about the different ways to choose a suitable mattress (either locally or online) that is the best “match” for you in terms of “comfort”, firmness, and PPP that can help you assess and minimize the risks of making a choice that doesn’t turn out as well as you hoped for and post #13 here which has more about the most important parts of the “value” of a mattress purchase which can help you make more meaningful quality/value comparisons between mattresses in terms of suitability (how well you will sleep), durability (how long you will sleep well), and the overall value of a mattress compared to your other finalists based on all the parts of your personal value equation that are most important to you.

If you let me know your city or zip code I’d be happy to let you know about the better options or possibilities I’m aware of in your area.

If you are considering online options then the mattress shopping tutorial includes several links to lists of many of the better online options I’m aware of (in the optional online step) that include many different types and categories of mattresses in a wide range of designs, budgets, firmness levels, and with different return/exchange policies that would be worth considering (including a link to a list of online memory foam mattresses).

Phoenix

Thank you very much for the thoughtful and thorough response. I really appreciate it.

As for my zip code, it is 07726, although I think I prefer to make a purchase online as I feel I can get the best deals and not have to deal with salesmen pressuring me and trying to make as much commission off of me as they can.

Hi AliMusa,

Subject to confirming that any retailer or manufacturer on the list you wish to deal with is completely transparent about the materials and components in their mattresses (see this article) and to making sure that any mattress you are considering meets your criteria and the quality/value guidelines here … the better options or possibilities I’m aware of in and around the Englishtown/Manalapin areas would be listed in the Red Bank list in post #2 here and the Monroe Township/Newark area list in post #7 here.

These are the types of stores that the tutorial is designed to help you avoid and generally don’t sell good quality/value mattresses (typically chain stores that dominate much of the industry).

On the other hand … there are many local factory direct manufacturers and better retailers that don’t have commissioned salespeople, don’t have any pressure, have knowledgeable and experienced staff than provide great assistance and guidance, and sell some very good quality/value mattresses that would be well worth considering. They also give you the chance to make side by side comparisons between different mattresses so you can experience the differences between them in person and decide which of them is the best “match” for you in terms of comfort, firmness, and PPP (Posture and alignment, Pressure relief, and your own Personal preferences) which isn’t possible with an online purchase that you can’t test or compare with other mattresses in person.

In other words I wouldn’t assume that one is necessarily better quality/value or a better “deal” than the other and each of them have their own advantages and disadvantages.

Phoenix

Unfortunately, all of these recommended stores are 1.5+ hours away from my house, which makes it very difficult for me.

Hi AliMusa,

Sorry … I should have also linked you to the list for the area within about 30 miles of Red Bank, NJ here (now corrected).

Outside of the retailers that are included on that list, the ones that are included in the Monroe Township/Newark I linked previously that are inside about 35 miles of you include …

http://www.shovlinmattress.com/ Fanwood, NJ. Factory direct manufacturer and a member of this site.

https://www.chiromatic.com/ Princeton, NJ. Retailer.

https://www.mycustombedding.com/ Clark, NJ. Factory direct manufacturer.

https://www.whitelotus.net/ Highland Park, NJ. Factory direct manufacturer

Shop Affordable Home Furnishings & Home Goods - IKEA Elizabeth, NJ. Factory direct manufacturer

If you extend the distance to about 50 miles then there would be many more.

Phoenix

Thank you. Those are definitely much closer. As for online retailers, is there a list of recommended retailers? I can’t seem to find one for some reason.

Hi AliMusa,

See my comments in my original reply in post #2

The steps are highlighted in bold and the optional step is after step #5 in the tutorial. There are links to 5 different lists but one of them is for Canada.

Phoenix

[quote=“Phoenix” post=63735]Hi AliMusa,

See my comments in my original reply in post #2

The steps are highlighted in bold and the optional step is after step #5 in the tutorial. There are links to 5 different lists but one of them is for Canada.

Phoenix[/quote]

Thank you. Now, is there a “best” choice in terms of who the most reputable are, with the happiest customers? I know everyone sleeps differently, but is there a particular group of mattresses that have better ratings/reviews than other online retailers? I see Tuft & Needle recommended quite often, so that is on top of my list, as well as Casper, but are there other strong contenders?

Judging by the list, I have Dream Foam, Brooklyn Bedding, Novosbed, Nest Bedding, Tuft & Needle, and Casper.

I PREFER to spend around $600-$750, but I have absolutely no problem spending a little more if it is worth it. Are there any on my current list that I should avoid, based on my wants/needs/situation?

Also, is there a post anywhere with recommended bedding (sheets, etc.)?

Hi Alimusa,

There is no such thing as the “best mattress” … there is only a mattress that is “best for you”, regardless of whether the same mattress may be “best” for anyone else. Every person may have different budget ranges, different needs and preferences, and different criteria that are important parts of their own personal value equation.

I would also reread these comments in my first reply in this topic which can help you with “how” to choose …

Assuming that the materials in a mattress you are considering are durable enough for your body type and meet the quality/durability guidelines here relative to your weight range … the choice between different types and combinations of materials and components or different types of mattresses are more of a preference and a budget choice than a “better/worse” choice (see this article). The best way to know which type of materials or which type of mattresses you tend to prefer in general terms will be based on your own testing and personal experience because different people can have very different preferences.

While other people’s comments about the knowledge and service of a particular business can certainly be very helpful … I would always keep in mind that you are the only one that can feel what you feel on a mattress and I would be cautious about about using anyone else’s suggestions, experiences or reviews on a specific mattress (either positive or negative) or review sites in general as a reliable source of information or guidance about how you will feel on the same mattress or how suitable or how durable a mattress may be for you. In many if not most cases they can be more misleading than helpful because a mattress that would be a perfect choice for one person or even a larger group of people in terms of comfort, firmness, and PPP may be completely unsuitable for someone else to sleep on (even if they are in a similar weight range). In other words … reviews or other people’s experiences in general won’t tell you much if anything about the suitability, quality, durability, or “value” of a mattress for any particular person (see post #13 here).

Assuming that you are referring to the Nest Bedding Love Bed and not one of their other mattresses … all of these except Dreamfoam are what I call “simplified choice” mattresses which is one of the online lists in the tutorial. There is more information about all of them (again except for Dreamfoam) along with many of the other “simplified choice” online mattresses in post #2 here in the simplified choice mattress topic. I would also make sure you read the first post in the same topic as well.

Dreamfoam isn’t a "simplified choice mattress because they make a wide range of mattresses … not just one … but they have a range of great quality/value choices. Nest Bedding also has more than one mattress that would be worth considering but their Love Bed is the one that is included on the simplified choice list.

Dreamfoam, Brooklyn Bedding, Nest Bedding, and Novosbed are all members of this site which means that I think highly of them and I believe that they compete well with the best in the industry in terms of their quality, value, service, knowledge, and transparency. Having said that … the members here certainly aren’t the only source of good quality/value mattresses and Casper and Tuft & Needle are also worth considering if you believe that you would prefer either of them over the others and they also meet all the parts of your personal value equation that are most important to you.

The only way to know for certain which specific mattress you would like best will be based on your own side by side comparisons which of course isn’t possible with online choices.

When you can’t test a mattress in person then the most reliable source of guidance is always a more detailed phone conversation with a knowledgeable and experienced retailer or manufacturer that has your best interests at heart and who can help “talk you through” the specifics of their mattresses and the properties and “feel” of the materials they are using (fast or slow response, resilience, firmness etc) and the options they have available that may be the best “match” for you based on the information you provide them, any local testing you have done or mattresses you have slept on and liked or other mattresses you are considering that they are familiar with, and the “averages” of other customers that are similar to you. They will know more about “matching” their specific mattress designs and firmness levels to different body types, sleeping positions, and preferences (or to other mattresses that they are familiar with) than anyone else.

While again nobody can speak to how any specific mattress will “feel” for someone else or whether it will be a good “match” in terms of comfort, firmness, and PPP because this is too subjective and relative to different body types, sleeping positions, and individual preferences, sensitivities, and circumstances and you are the only one that can feel what you feel on a mattress … outside of PPP (which is the most important part of “value”), the next most important part of the value of a mattress purchase is durability which is all about how long you will sleep well on a mattress. This is the part of your research that you can’t see or “feel” and assessing the durability and useful life of a mattress depends on knowing the specifics of its construction and the type and quality of the materials inside it regardless of the name of the manufacturer on the label (or how a mattress feels in a showroom or when it is relatively new) so again I would always make sure that you find out information listed here so you can compare the materials and components to the quality/durability guidelines here to make sure there are no lower quality materials or weak links in a mattress that would be a cause for concern relative to the durability and useful life of a mattress before making any purchase. I would certainly avoid any mattress that doesn’t meet the quality/durability guidelines relative to your weight range.

There is some information about sheets and bedding in post #7 here and the other posts and sources of information it links to that may be helpful.

A mattress protector is also important to protect your mattress from the body fluids and oils that we all release each night, to help reduce dust mite populations, to keep your sleeping surface in a clean and hygienic condition, and to protect against accidents and spills. It will also protect the warranty because mattress warranties are usually voided with even a small stain on the mattress. There is more about the pros and cons of the different types of mattress protectors and some examples of each of them in post #89 here.

Phoenix

Thank you x100 yet again. I will have to read your responses many times before fully understanding what to look for and what to expect.

Is there a source anywhere that provides the customer with the most important questions to ask when online shopping?

Hi AliMusa,

There is more information about the 3 most important parts of the “value” of a mattress purchase in post #13 here (which is one of the links in my earlier replies) which can help you make more meaningful quality/value comparisons between mattresses in terms of suitability (how well you will sleep), durability (how long you will sleep well), and the overall value of a mattress compared to your other finalists based on suitability, durability, and all the other parts of your personal value equation that are most important to you (including the price of course and the options you have available after a purchase if your choice doesn’t turn out as well as you hoped for).

I would ask them which of their mattresses or firmness options would have the best chance of success in terms of comfort, firmness, and PPP (although of course if they only have one firmness option they will generally suggest that you try it since they would only have that one option available).

As I also mentioned previously … outside of PPP (which is the most important part of “value”), the next most important part of the value of a mattress purchase is durability which is all about how long you will sleep well on a mattress. Again this is the part of your research that you can’t see or “feel” and assessing the durability and useful life of a mattress depends on knowing the specifics of its construction and the type and quality of the materials inside it regardless of the name of the manufacturer on the label (or how a mattress feels in a showroom or when it is relatively new) so again I would always make sure that you find out information listed here so you can compare the materials and components to the quality/durability guidelines here to make sure there are no lower quality materials or weak links in a mattress relative to your weight range that would be a cause for concern in terms of the durability and useful life of a mattress before making any purchase. With the mattresses you mentioned this information should be already be readily available on the forum (but of course if it isn’t then you would need to ask them).

Finally I would ask about any of the other parts of your personal value equation that are most important to you including the options you have after a purchase to return the mattress and any costs involved “just in case” and in spite of the “best efforts” of everyone involved (both you and the retailer you are buying from), the mattress doesn’t turn out to be as suitable a choice as you hoped for and you don’t sleep well on it.

In its simplest form … choosing the “best possible” mattress for any particular person really comes down to first finding a few knowledgeable and transparent retailers and/or manufacturers that sell the types of mattresses that you are most interested in and that you have confirmed will provide you with the all the information you need about the materials and components inside the mattresses they sell so you will be able to make informed choices and make meaningful comparisons between mattresses and then …

  1. Careful testing (hopefully using the testing guidelines in the tutorial) to make sure that a mattress is a good match for you in terms of “comfort”, firmness, and PPP … and/or that you are comfortable with the options you have available to return, exchange, or “fine tune” the mattress and any costs involved if you can’t test a mattress in person or aren’t confident that your mattress is a suitable choice.

  2. Checking to make sure that there are no lower quality materials or weak links in the mattress relative to your weight range that could compromise the durability and useful life of the mattress.

  3. Comparing your finalists for “value” based on #1 and #2 and all the other parts of your personal value equation that are most important to you.

Phoenix

Thank you. I’ve definitely got a lot of work to do.

Two more questions (for now):

  1. Is there a best time of year to purchase a mattress, in terms of sales and lowered prices for the next seasons models?

  2. If I am making a lifestyle change to lose weight, is this something I should factor into my purchase?

Hi AliMusa,

No. Better manufacturers and retailers don’t generally “negotiate” (see post #6 here) or have “fake sales” with large discounts based on the time of year or holidays (see the guidelines here and post #5 here). While they may occasionally have sales with smaller discounts or sell floor models at a reduced price … I would treat retailers or manufacturers that negotiate their prices or have “major holiday sales” at certain times with “huge” discounts as a red flag because manufacturers or retailers that sell good quality/value mattresses don’t need to negotiate or have “fake sales” with misleading discounts to create a false sense of urgency as a sales tactic and they sell good quality/value mattresses every day of the year at good prices that are already very fair and reasonable.

It’s certainly possible that if you lose a significant amount of weight that your needs and preferences in a mattress could change but you can always add a topper if you need some additional softness and pressure relief and there are also component mattresses available with replaceable layers and components that allow you to adjust the comfort and support of a mattress after a purchase by rearranging or replacing layers without having to replace your entire mattress if your needs and preferences change after a purchase.

Phoenix

AliMusa asked:

To expand upon what Phoenix already wrote, there is no one best time of year to purchase a mattress.

While the industry has a few major markets every year, there really is no “next year’s model” introduction (like in auto sales). Even when new lines are introduced, the manufacturers generally don’t lower the price on their remaining amount of quilt that has already been produced. Once they arrive near the end of their backstock, they’ll often have just a few yards of quilt left “here and there”, and they’ll often use this in “crazy quilt” mattresses for special purchases by retailers for promotions where a mattress might have a different fabric on one side as compared to the other.