Advice getting a mattress topper for 200LBS Male

I currently am sleeping on a simmons beautyrest innerspring extra firm with the top removed for a “hybrid” build that is DIY. Back and side sleeper. Clearly i need some kind cushioning but its hard to know what to get exactly. I have a 28 ILD topper right now from brooklyn bedding, and its proving to be a bit hard on my shoulders (pushes them forward a bit), and back/legs. What confuses me is how much “topper” i need. The extra firm springs push my hips up, but they also do craddle my lower back. And now it seems like its craddling it a bit more than im comfortable with (maybe hips are sinking in too much?). The 3" 28 ILD does help some, but i still seem to feel the “pressure” of my bed. And putting my 2 inches 19 ILD dunlop on top, helps, but only initially. Plus on my side the 3 inch topper is hard on my hips and legs. When side sleeping my shoulders also get too much pressure. That topper seems to be too firm, but im not sure if i simply need a 3 inch softer talalay (maybe dunlop) or should i go with 2+1 layering. Im 200 LBS/6 ft and have been told by the woman at mattress247 on ebay (dont recall her name) that 28 is too firm for my weight/height. And that 19 ILD or 22-27 would be “better”. One issue i have with this might be that my shoulders round too much at night, which also leads to neck pain because the neck over curves (if u know what i mean). Something ive dealt with in the past as i have somewhat rounded shoulders (i have broad shoulders) during sleep (something hard to avoid w/o sleeping on a really firm surface (which makes side sleeping very hard to do). So i want to avoid “sinking through” to the point that my shoulders round and i end up sleeping in a hunched position, which leads to neck discomfort for me. Thats why i thought maybe a 2 inch medium with a 1 or 2 inch soft over it, but im not sure if just a softer 3" would work better.

What would you suggest i try? Would a 3" 22-27 talalay (blended is about all i can afford ATM) be a good place to start? Or would i sink right through it.

Hello Mike77

Thank you kindly for your inquiry. And welcome to the Mattress Forum!

It sounds as though your mattress is extremely firm, which maybe causing a 28ILD layer to feel a bit firmer than it normally would. If this is the case, I would recommend something slightly softer, but not too soft, like a 3" 22-26 ILD range. If you go too soft, you risk going right thru the layer, straight to your firm mattress, and therefore not accomplishing what you set out to do.
I recommend purchasing from a company that offers a layer exchange as well as a return policy. This allows you to either exchange for a different density, and if that ultimately does not work out for you, you can return it.

Please keep us posted, and don’t hesitate to ask should you have further questions.