Best option for combo back/side sleepers

Mattress Talk Needs & Personal Preferences
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Hi there! I’m 5’10’’ 175 lbs, and am a combination back/side sleeper.

I recently tried the Helix Sunset Elite, Midnight Elite, Twilight Elite, AND Dusk Elite, and all of them have been huge failures (though the Dusk Elite is the closest to the mark). I wake up every day with lower back pain, and I’m guessing that it’s because there are just so many layers of “comfort material” that the zoned support from the coils is ineffectual, leading my hips to sink in (even on the Dusk Elite, which is supposed to be quite firm).

I’ve now spent more hours than I can count (easily upwards of 100) researching mattresses over the past year, and I’m at my absolute wits’ end. I just can’t believe it’s this hard, and that reviews say such divergent things about the same mattresses even when using “objective” criteria to judge them.

Until last year, I slept on a Zenhaven mattress – even on the softer side, my shoulders would go totally numb while I was sleeping, which drove me insane. I got a 3’’ Saatva memory foam topper thereafter, and that helped for a while, but after a year I started getting some lower back pain (probably because the topper was softening too much).

In any case, I’m now leaning toward either the BB Aurora Luxe medium (no cloud pillow top because I’m afraid my hips will sink in too much), or the DLX LatexLux medium. The latter has a review on reddit from someone who said it was too soft, but that person provided no indication of their height/weight, so I’m not sure what to make of that. I was also considering the Avocado Luxury Organic standard, but that’s crazy expensive and seems like it’d make my shoulders go numb (even though it’d probably be good for the back).

Does either the BB Aurora Luxe medium or the DLX LatexLux medium seem like the right call to you, given the concerns I’ve outlined with sinking hips, my sleeping style (side/back combo), and my height and weight (5’10’', 175 lbs)?

Thank you very, very much for your guidance.

@DLX

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If you haven’t tried a body pillow, I strongly recommend getting an inexpensive memory foam one (using shredded foam) that’s a simple rectangular shape and about five feet long. The main point is to provide support for your upper leg. I use another head pillow to hug between my arms but I’m over 6 foot tall.

The combo of pillows made a HUGE difference in my back pain issues within just a couple of weeks. I just needed that extra support to align my spine a lot better when side sleeping. You can find body pillows on Amazon that work well or shop around on other sites.

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Hi xuz137,
Welcome to the Mattress UnderGround.

Wow, it must be a frustrating journey thus far as you have tried a variety of mattresses and nothing has met the mark.
At your height and weight some of the mattresses that you have tried would seem to be solid choices. It would be interesting to know how long you trialed each of those mattresses.

Lower back pain can be an indication that you are not getting enough support form the mattress. The Elite series from helix all use the same support system. The sunset, I would imagine would be way too soft and your sleeping style, back and side, you may be hammocking your back when sleeping on your back and when your hips sink too much on your side, too soft a mattress causes more strain on the lower back muscles.

The Dusk version of the helix series tends to offer better support (in the comfort layer) for back and stomach sleepers, which keeps the midsection from sinking too much while in those positions. A key component that may be missing in your case, even though you are only 175lbs, is a more robust support layer to maintain you from sinking in that mid area.

The Aurora, although a very nice mattress, may not offer any better support layer than the helix’s you have tried.

The Helix Plus Elite and the Titan Plus Elite offer much better support layers with enough cushioning without too much sinking and straining.

Given your specific concerns (hips sinking, back pain, and combination sleeping), I’d suggest leaning toward the DLX LatexLux Medium. Latex will give you more consistent support, and its responsiveness should help avoid the sinking feeling you encountered with the Helix models you have tried. It also offers better breathability and durability over time compared to some foam-heavy mattresses. Since you don’t need super-soft cushioning, the medium firmness might provide the right amount of pressure relief for both your back and side sleeping positions.

Avocado can be a good choice, again a nice mattress, different comfort layer, as it is very resilient latex which could offer you the support that you need.

If you’re still wary about the feel of latex, the two that I mentioned could be a backup option to consider. Plus, if you choose DLX’s Latex Luxe, those layers can be swapped out for HD foam.

You do have some sensible options, DLX, Titan Plus Elite and Helix Plus Elite.

There are definitely other mattresses available. However, since you’ve found the Dusk Elite close to what you’re looking for, the three options mentioned will offer a similar feel while providing a higher level of support, with the DLX offering the option to get you there utilizing latex and taking you to the next step.

Hope this helps,

Maverick

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Thank you for reaching out and sharing such a detailed account of your experiences. It certainly sounds like you’ve been through a lot in your search for the right mattress, and I appreciate the opportunity to help guide you through this process.

We understand your frustration; buying a mattress can be quite nuanced. For some, buying online is a great option, while others really struggle to find a comfortable mattress. How do you find the right mattress? If you consult with us, we will ask questions and be straightforward about whether there’s a likelihood our mattress will be comfortable for you.

Based on what you’ve described so far, particularly your concerns about hip sinking and the need for a mattress that provides enough support without being too firm, I’d advise against the DLX LatexLux. While it’s a great mattress, given your previous experiences with numbness in your shoulders with the Zenhaven, the uplift and pushback characteristic of latex might not suit you well, especially considering your mixed sleeping style.

As you noted, comfort is subjective. We understand there are comments out there suggesting our mattresses feel softer than expected. Behind the scenes, this has led to a significant number of people choosing something too firm based on a few people’s comments. However, it is easier to make a mattress softer than firmer with the Premier and LatexLux models. Please note that these comments are factual and 100% accurate for that person’s preferences. Factors such as height, weight, age, sleep position, previous mattresses (both comfortable and uncomfortable), the type of pillow, and the bed frame supporting the mattress, as well as, to a minor degree, the type of sheets and mattress protector, all play a role.

Even supposedly objective measures can vary from person to person. The biggest factors that objective testing doesn’t account for are elements beyond the mattress. For example, motion transfer is impacted by the bed frame, type of sheets, and mattress protector. If you are lying the mattress bare on the floor and that is how you’ll sleep on it, the testing you see online as objective is then more likely to be accurate. For instance, we bought a new comforter last year, and despite our nearly 10-year-old mattress never feeling warm before, I now wake up sweating every night. The mattress didn’t change—other factors did.

We often place the blame solely on the mattress. While the mattress is a contributing factor and carries most of the weight in terms of comfort and feel, all factors need to be taken into account.

I’m not sure if the mattresses you’ve been through were bought locally, but it might be worth shopping locally given the number of mattresses you have been through. If there is one close by, we’d recommend a local mattress maker who can rebuild the mattress if it is uncomfortable, but not everyone offers this service. The other option is DIY (not our area of expertise), which requires a lot of trial and error. There are communities here and on Reddit that might be helpful.

While we have had a lot of success with people buying our mattress online with less than a 5% return rate, we always love to answer questions and confirm if the mattress will be comfortable. Given your past experiences and mattresses not being comfortable, we’d say there is a 50-50 chance that we could get you comfortable, and we would not recommend the LatexLux, but rather the Premier.

We’re here to help, so if you have any more questions or need further assistance, please don’t hesitate to ask.

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First of all, thank you so much to @Maverick and @DLX for your super detailed and helpful replies.

I spent almost an hour on the phone with Jeannette (sp?) at DLX today, and ultimately decided to buy the LatexLux half soft, half medium. We also discussed the replies here, and while she initially also leaned toward the Premier Hybrid, she became persuaded that the LatexLux could be a better option for two reasons:

  1. I liked back sleeping on my old Zenhaven mattress and generally liked its feel; Jeannette thought that even the soft latex in the LatexLux was likely to provide enough support for comfortable back sleeping (and that my hips wouldn’t sink in too much).
  2. The problem with side sleeping on the Zenhaven (numb shoulders) was probably due to the fact that that mattress only has a 1/2’’ cover on top of the latex. The LatexLux has a 1.5’’ layer, which may provide (particularly on the soft side of the mattress) enough shoulder pressure relief.

After the type and firmness options were established, we discussed foundations. I have a Thuma bed frame, with 2.5’’ slats that are spaced just under 3’’ apart. Jeannette thought that sounded like it’d probably provide enough support, but advised that if I noticed any sinking in the middle of the mattress, I could consider a bunkie board.

Next, we discussed mattress height. Jeannette noted that the 12’’ would perhaps create a little more stability or firmness than the 14’‘, but that the difference particularly for latex would be small enough that I should just choose whichever I’d prefer for aesthetic reasons. I chose the 14’'.

Finally, we talked about including a belly strip (I think that’s what it’s called, but can’t remember), which DLX would provide free of charge in my order. This would provide additional firmness in the midsection in case I feel that I need more back support (and since that’s one of the things I’m most worried about, this seems like a good idea to me).

It’s so nice when the people you’re communicating with have actual product knowledge and expertise – not just a series of things they’re trained to say in response to a couple prompts! Major difference already with Helix and Brooklyn Bedding, whose reps don’t really seem to know the products firsthand at all.

Really, really hoping this will work out, and once again, extremely grateful for the replies on Mattress Underground.

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The most important thing to do at this point is when you get the mattress, you foundation is a key component. Then, your pillow needs to match your side of the mattress and firmness. Lastly, no matter what it feels like on day one through ten, give it a month or two to fully acclimate to the mattress. People often will feel different at first and make a snap judgment which is why they fail.

DLX is an excellent company with awesome customer service. Their mattresses are so well built and customer service so good, i bought my 86yo mother-in-law a premier hybrid (before the latex lux was introduced) and her pain is gone.

She was great from day one. She just loves it!

Maverick