Bought the wrong mattress, how to be more comfortable

Hi all,

Unfortunately I found this site AFTER I bought my mattress and I’m looking for advice on how to make this mattress more comfortable for me since it can’t be returned or exchanged.

Background: Sleepers are me (5’ 2" and 140 lbs, side sleeper) and husband (6’ and 310 lbs, back sleeper). He has back pain, I have no particular pain issues. With our old inner spring mattress his back pain seemed worse, I had mild hip pain on my sleeping side the last hour or so of the night maybe 25% of the time which went away once I got up.

New mattress: Husband became convinced that he wanted a tempurpedic after hearing his brother rave about his for several years. We bought a cloud supreme and have been sleeping on it now for 10 weeks. It feels very hard to me and now I have pain in both hips and both shoulders that often lasts all day. However, husband’s back pain seems somewhat improved.

What can I do to make myself more comfortable? A mattress topper? And if so I’d appreciate any suggestions of specific toppers. Thanks!

Hi musmom8689,

One thing you might check is if you have placed a mattress protector, mattress pad, or some other kind of topper over the memory foam. Memory foam gets softer with heat, and so if you’ve used a mattress pad which makes it harder for the body heat to transfer to the memory foam then it might remain firmer. Also, room temperature can make a difference for the same reason… If you keep the room really cool at night you might try keeping it a bit warmer.

Based on the averages, with you being lighter and a side sleeper, both factors would generally indicate you need a softer comfort layer. With your husband being heavier and a back sleeper, both of those factors would generally indicate he needs a firmer mattress.

If you get into the realm of buying a new mattress, several (often latex) feature a side-to-side split within a single mattress so that each of you can tailor your own side to accomplish good PPP.

Hi musmom8689,

If your mattress is too firm then there are some suggestions that can help soften up a new memory foam mattress in post #2 here (although dn has already covered some of them). It also includes a line to some topper guidelines that may be helpful.

If you end up needing to add a topper then you can always add a topper to your side only if your husbands side is already working well although this does mean that your mattress will have an uneven height from side to side. If you add a topper that covers both sides to keep the side to side height equal then I would use the thinnest topper that you think will give you the additional softness you need because adding too much thickness and softness on top could be fairly risky in terms of alignment for your husband (which could lead to the return of his back pain).