I keep getting an error message. I’ve tried posting my message multiple times, but I keep getting “error”. However, if I try to submit something else, it works. What’s going on? Is there a limit on message length?
Hi everyone,
First all, thanks for all you do. I have been lurking around this forum for days, and I have already learned so much. This is such a great forum. Kudos to the creators, mods, and regulars!
On to business - the most frequent topic: I need your help deciding on which mattresses to consider for purchase.
First the background - I just bought a new mattress a few months ago. I’m 40 y/o, my wife is 38. We married in 2003 and bought a mattress then, and we finally had to get a new one last year. I have 3 herniated discs in my neck and constantly deal with muscle spasms and headaches as a result. I know a mattress won’t fix that, but I am hopeful that there are some that can at least not make it worse. Last year, I did many weeks of what I thought was research and narrowed it down to a Purple and a Nectar. We got the Nectar. Recently, the pain in my neck and shoulders has become unbearable. I believe it to be caused by the Nectar memory foam already sagging. I just can’t seem to get comfortable for at least an hour each night, but then when I wake up I’m hurting and stiff. I’m 5’9", 165 lbs btw. My wife is comfortable in the bed, but she will wake up in pools of sweat from the heat caused by the memory foam. The reason we got rid of the old mattress was bad sagging (but this was after 15+ years) that had started making her hips and back hurt, and my neck and shoulders hurt. Her hips are fine now, but she can’t stand the heat. My neck and shoulders are worse than with the old mattress with this new Nectar. We passed on the Purple due to complaints about bad sagging after 1-2 years.
there is a lot more to this message, but the forum refuses to let me post it. I’ve tried dozens of times. I’m not sure what is going on here. Can I not mention name brands?
So, I’m a side (mainly) and back sleeper (I prefer my back, but it makes me snore). My wife sleeps in any position you can imagine. haha My wife is a few inches shorter than me, and 10s of pounds lighter (not allowed to say how many :), but she is not heavy at all).
So, I was planning to get rid of the Nectar and get something new. As I was “researching” again, I luckily stumbled across this forum.
Before finding this forum, I was considering the:
Ca sper W ave H ybrid
H eli x M idnight Luxe
Nol ah Evo lution 15
Gho st Box Flex or Lu xury Hy brid
She rwood Dun lopillo Hybrid
South erland Signature Hybrid
Slee pEZ Select Sl eep Hy brid
Arizone Pr emium Ul timate Hy brid
My Gr een Mattress Nat ural Escape
Lu ma Sleep Hyb id Slumber or Nat ural Latex Hy brid
Ne st (not sure how to choose one)
So here I am with too many to choose from! Ha! So I’m looking for help. I know I don’t want Memory Foam again. I don’t need something that sinks in like that or gets too hot. I need something better for necks and shoulders, but I can’t reaggravate my wife’s hips. Comfort over price (I’ll pay for comfort, I just need to stop hurting).
Any thoughts or advice? Any of these that I can throw out right away?
Thanks in advance everyone.
Mark
Hi Mark - Sensei also had some technical trouble in posting a reply to your inquiry! We are sorry you ran into this error in posting and will be looking into possible causes.
I am posting this reply on Sensei’s behalf:
Hey Mark,
Welcome to The Mattress Underground 
! Nice having you here and thanks for your question.
First all, thanks for all you do. I have been lurking around this forum for days, and I have already learned so much. This is such a great forum. Kudos to the creators, mods, and regulars!
Thanks for your kind words on the TMU, Mark; they are really appreciated! Glad to hear that you’ve taken the leap from lurking to chatting, and that you find your conversations here useful for your mattress research. Our apologies for the posting glitch you encountered before; not sure what happened there but you seemed to have sorted things out 
. Now, to your questions.
I’m sorry to learn of your neck and shoulder pain worsening, Mark. Life with multiple herniated discs most certainly must be endlessly frustrating to endure and a bed without adequate comfort and support would not make matters better. As a “lurker” of the forum, you likely know that we approach the subject of medical issues with much caution, as we aren’t licensed in any way to advise those concerns; however, we will do our best to guide you down the educational process of understanding how to shop for a mattress and make better choices.
I’m also sorry to hear that your year old Nectar isn’t offering the correct support for you. I took a peak at its product specs online but found little of specific details, mostly only their proprietary foam names and such. It is an 11"/ 5 layer foam mattress available in one firmness: medium/ 6.5 in feel on a scale from 1-10. Without knowing the densities of any of the foam layers, it’s not possible to understand where the point(s) of failure are causing the sagging you describe. What size is your Nectar? You mention a little later in your post that you’ll be returning it, but have you tried placing it on the floor and testing it there a few nights to rule out problems with your foundation? Also, did you replace your pillows with your new mattress?
[quote] I’m 5’9", 165 lbs btw. My wife is comfortable in the bed, but she will wake up in pools of sweat from the heat caused by the memory foam. The reason we got rid of the old mattress was bad sagging (but this was after 15+ years) that had started making her hips and back hurt, and my neck and shoulders hurt. Her hips are fine now, but she can’t stand the heat. My neck and shoulders are worse than with the old mattress with this new Nectar. We passed on the Purple due to complaints about bad sagging after 1-2 years.
So, I’m a side (mainly) and back sleeper (I prefer my back, but it makes me snore). My wife sleeps in any position you can imagine. haha My wife is a few inches shorter than me, and 10s of pounds lighter (not allowed to say how many , but she is not heavy at all). So, I was planning to get rid of the Nectar and get something new. As I was “researching” again, I luckily stumbled across this forum.[/quote]
Thanks for sharing some of your personal stats as they will provide you both with clues as to what types materials and constructions would be most suitable for your personal preferences. 15+ years is a pretty decent run for a mattress’s life, so some amount of sag at that point isn’t unusual. What brand and type mattress was it? Were there qualities that you liked about it before it gave up its support? And are you using the same foundation now that you used with it?
The characteristics of memory foam seem to make it “polarizing” in that people either really prefer it’s comfort feel and “hug” to that of other foams or they do not like it at all. It is also the “polar-opposite” of latex in the way that your body will “sink into” the cradle your body’s heat will cause as opposed to the “sleeping on/ uplifting” feel of buoyancy that latex provides. In general, memory foam tends to sleep the hottest of all foams as it forms the deepest cradle and is not as open celled as other types of polyfoam, meaning that air does not flow through it as easily. For others who may not have experience with memory foam and its unique properties, the conundrum of it’s tendency for some to “sleep hot” versus its strengths of pressure relief and motion isolation can result in conflicting feelings of preference priority. In your wife’s case, sleeping hot was a deal breaker for her.
[quote]Before finding this forum, I was considering the:
Casper Wave Hybrid
Helix Midnight Luxe
Nolah Evolution 15
Ghost Box Flex or Luxury Hy brid
Sherwood Dunlopillo Hybrid
Southerland Signature Hybrid
SlepEZ Select Sleep Hbrid
Arizone Premium Ultimate Hy brid
My Green Mattress Naural Escape
Luma Sleep Hyid Slumber or Natural Latex Hybrid
Nest (not sure how to choose one)
So here I am with too many to choose from! Ha! So I’m looking for help. I know I don’t want Memory Foam again. I don’t need something that sinks in like that or gets too hot. I need something better for necks and shoulders, but I can’t reaggravate my wife’s hips. Comfort over price (I’ll pay for comfort, I just need to stop hurting). Any thoughts or advice? Any of these that I can throw out right away?
[/quote]
That’s quite an impressive list of mattress contenders, Mark. As you have been in the background watching things for a bit, you likely know that I won’t make recommendations outside of the TMU’s trusted member directory as there is no way to guarantee those manufacturers offer the same transparancy and best practices as required by our highly [url=Vision ~ Recommended by The Mattress Underground - The Mattress Underground]vetted criteria. Following your saying that “I know I don’t want Memory Foam again. I don’t need something that sinks in like that or gets too hot”, you’ve removed the above memory foam hybrid mattresses from your proposed candidates: Casper, Helix, Nolah, GhostBed, and Southerland.
Thanks for considering trusted members Sleep EZ, Arizona Premium, My Green Mattress, Luma Sleep, and Nest Bedding for a possible mattress purchase! Each of these manufacturers offer either dunlop or talalay latex comfort layers in their hybrid mattresses and would be happy to consult with you over a call to identify what materials and layering combinations would best serve your comfort needs and preferences. If you’re going with a king size, you may even consider a split set up of 2 twin XLs to better serve specialized support for your herniated disc issues and both of yours varying comfort preferences. Question for you: have you slept on a latex mattress before? Are you located in an area where COVID-safe showrooms are available for mattress testing? You may find this mattress shopping checklist of questions useful for working with a manufacturer to better understand what information you’ll need to make durability assessments and this articlehelpful for showroom call talking points. Good luck with narrowing down choices and let us know how things go, Mark .
Sensei
understood!
The Nectar is a King. We also bought a new bed when we got the mattress. We figured it was time to move from the Queen to a King. It’s a platform bed with slats spaced 2" apart. We do not use a box spring any longer. I have not tried placing it on the floor. We did get new pillows, but I elected to continue using my “old” one. It’s a MyPillow.
It was a Sealy pillowtop. The bed and mattress were given to us by one of her relatives when we got married, so I’m not sure exactly what kind it was and what its stats were. Honestly, I never gave it much thought because I never had much pain with it. I know that’s no help. As stated above, we have a new foundation as well.
This is a big help just by itself. Thank you.
Thank you. I have been consulting Sleep EZ through their web chat and through this forum. I will likely call them before I make any decision.
I have not slept on a latex mattress before. Since I posted this, my wife did convince me to buy a latex topper first, to see if we can avoid mattress shopping again. I bought a 3" topper (soft, ILD 20) from Sleep on Latex, and it should arrive tomorrow or Friday. I’m dubious, but we’ll see how that goes.
Thank you for the link to the checklist, I will study up on that.
Thanks for everything, and I’ll definitely post as things progress.
looks like i messed up the quote function. I don’t see how to edit my post. Sorry about this. I’m trying to learn this forum, but it works differently from other forums I’m used to.
There’s no edit function like many forums so you have to ask a moderator to edit the post for you to fix something.
Tip: when writing a post use the preview tab (top left above the text box) to see what your post will look like before you submit it, then click the write tab if you need to edit it further before submitting it.
Hey mark5280,
Thanks for your reply .
Hope its okay with you, but I edited your post to update the quote closing tags. There are two ways to use quotes within the text editor, I had to add the first one as a screen shot as it was creating a quote instead of illustrating the process:
OR[indent]
2. Copy, paste, and highlight the text to be quoted. In the text editor toolbar, click on the human and conversation bubble. The opening and closing tags are automatically generated.[/indent]
Thanks @Mattrebuild for mentioning the Preview tab, a view for checking the styling appearance and content review of a post:
I see from post #4 that you are receiving sound counsel from Sleep Ez regarding possible mattress options that would hopefully improve your chronic neck pain situation. Congrats on your new Sleep On Latex 3" topper purchase ! I regard both of these fine trusted members highly in terms of expertise, quality, and customer service post-sale. Have you received the topper and if so, has it improved your Nectar’s comfort feel? Looking forward to your updates and hoping for some pain relief improvements .
Sensei
Received the topper Monday. I have two nights of sleep on it. Hard to judge at this point.
Hey mark5280,
Thanks for the updates on your new Sleep On Latex topper ! Hopefully, the topper will help improve your mattress’s comfort feel and help ease your back pain as well. When you have time after you’ve given it a 30 day sleep adjustment period, let us know what your thoughts are on its’ comfort and feel .
Thanks,
Sensei