In the last 60+ days/nights I have tried every layer arrangement that seems like it would work. The closest to “my comfort” arrangement is the one I have come back around to. It is from bottom up: Firm dunlop/medium dunlop/medium talalay/medium dunlop. Twelve inches seems more substantial and is my preference. Sleeping on the medium dunlop layer/layers without the softness of the talalay gave me a bad night. Apparently it is the talalay layer giving me the body contouring/cradling that I want and could enjoy. But I am not without raging shoulder/arm pain/down into my fingers - that is ruining my life!! (Only someone experiencing that could understand). The pain stays all day, affecting everything in my day; causing me to dread bed time despite my exhaustion from not resting.
I am close to tears from the frustration of pain and exhaustion. And my return window is not only getting close, but heading into the hubbub of the holidays. I don’t know where to go from here. I am afraid to be stuck with it. From remembering my mattress that I enjoyed, I think it is probably the memory foam feel I am wishing for. Not just any squishy/quicksand feel, but soft with support. I don’t know how to find that. And - if quality latex with the option to arrange the layers to my comfort doesn’t - then what???!!
Hi seldel.
Sorry to hear about the shoulder pain.
Phoenix has some words about pain from/on a mattress in this post:
Shoulder and arm issues can come from a mattress that is too firm and puts direct pressure on the shoulders, the shoulder blades, or on the back muscles and can also cause soreness or numbness and tingling in the arms or can often come from postural issues as well. If the mattress is too firm then if you sleep on your side your shoulders may not sink in enough to relieve pressure and your upper body can “twist” away from the pressure so your upper body is “twisted” more forward while the lower body is still on its side. This spinal twisting or torsion can twist the spine in the upper body and lead to soreness in the area of the twist. There is some much more detailed information on shoulder and arm issues in posts #2 and #3 here.
Something to consider would be your pillow. People often don’t update their pillow situation when they replace a mattress.
To quote Phoenix (again):
The pillow that works best for you can vary with different mattresses depending on how much you are sinking into the mattress and the distance between your head and neck and the mattress surface. Softer mattresses may need thinner pillows and firmer mattresses may need thicker pillows but in very general terms side sleepers tend to need higher profile and possibly firmer pillows. If you are a side sleeper and your pillow is too thin or too soft then your head can bend sideways towards the mattress which could impair blood circulation or pinch nerves and could also increase the pressure on your shoulders. One indication of a pillow that is too thin could be if you sleep with your hand under the pillow.
Is a memory foam topper atop the rest of your latex build out of the question? I know we tend to sound like latex foam purists around here, but at the end of the day your personal preference and support needs > what we think or say.
A lot of people find the memory foam + latex combo to be really successful.
The other option could be to switch to a soft Talalay instead of a medium before opting for memory foam.
You could also try swapping the dunlop layer you currently have on top for the talalay layer underneath and see how that helps.
Please do keep us posted!
NikkiTMU
Thanks NikkiTMU.
As mentioned, I have tried different layer arrangements. The medium talalay was my first choice to sleep on directly; it is soft which is what I was going for…even though more firmness is advised for my body weight. The reason I put the medium dunlop over it was the feeling of needing (for lack of a better term) more ‘solidness’. I guess that translates to ‘support’(?) The feeling of needing to “brace” myself would translate to needing support - right? You can see I’m confused about that. I am 5’6" and 210-220 lbs. Sleeping on “firm” was a painful nightmare.
I have a memory foam topper (Bdeus) but it is the kind of soft that you sink in - sink and stuck. Not comfortable for me either. So that is a huge question for me - what to look for in memory foam to judge/shop for firmness/softness.
I have switched between pillows also. I will say, btw, that I never expected to find this much comfort in a shredded latex pillow. Very nice in that it is quite adjustable by adjusting to the desired amount of stuffing.
My return window is close and I will have to make a decision. I feel like that the latex is the most premium/quality way to go and I should be able to find my perfect comfort due to adjustability. But I just haven’t. I just don’t know where to go from here. I will, however make contact with the company for one last bit of coaching advice.
Thanks again NikkiTMU