So… it has come time for me to stop mooching off the valuable discussions and wealth of information on this site and de-lurk… Hi!
In the search for a bed that my husband and I could share without resentment or physical agony, I came across this wonderful place and read. And read. And read.
I have decided on the Sleep EZ 13000. I need the extra height for our Stickley sleigh bed and my husband is a big guy so thicker’s not a bad idea. That decision made, the Layering Conundrum™ begins. (Yes, I read it ALL! :lol: )
I suffer from multiple autoimmune disorders which include, but are not limited to, type 1 diabetes, systemic lupus, and Sjögren’s syndrome. Diabetic neuropathy (and Sjögren’s neuropathy), joint swelling, arthritic pain, cervical spine and shoulder issues, etc. are a constant but not necessarily all at once and not necessarily in the same areas. For instance, if the neuropathy in my feet is bad, I usually end up on my stomach so I can suspend my right foot off the side of the bed because even a sheet touching it will hurt. If my neck or my breathing are compromised, I might “nest” pillows to prop my head and chest up and maybe doze. My preference is side sleeping but WHICH side may be determined by which hip and/or knee is swollen at a given time. To top this off, if I am in a lupus “flare”, I may spend days (or even weeks) mostly in bed.
So… how do I go about determining what of those factors should be part of my consideration in how I layer my side of the mattress? How soft can I actually get a Sleep EZ bed without it actually making my joints worse rather than better? How soft can I get my side of the bed without needing a harness and carabiners to cuddle next to my husband on his “Extra firm is like dry white wine. NOT FIRM ENOUGH!” side. What do I prioritize in order to give me the best chance of a few hours sleep a night?
I don’t have any of your height weight information but quite frankly with the list of issues you are facing I would focus first on making sure your top layer was soft enough which means I would choose soft (unless something else seemed to strongly indicate otherwise). A more detailed conversation with Shawn though would be my #1 suggestion.
Since your circumstances seem to indicate a “top down” approach … then the rest of the layers would fall into place with gradually increasing firmness levels under the top layer which would be medium, firm, extra firm (or another firm). Again though I would strongly suggest talking with Shawn who has much more detailed knowledge of his own mattresses and feedback from customers with different body types and personal circumstances than I do.
If you could do some local testing on latex it would also be very helpful as a reference point because your personal experience will be more valuable and “accurate” than any “theory” and can be a very useful guideline.
The closest place that sells latex is an hour away (Savannah) which is a bit much for me but I will certainly speak with Shawn about our individual needs.
My husband is 6’2+" / 220 and I’m 5’5" / 135 so there’s a bit of a difference there. His size and penchant for stomach sleeping certainly requires a very firm sleeping surface. Even with that, he puts a pillow under his hips to even out his back. I, on the other hand, could sink blissfully into a mattress made of down but I rather doubt that would make me happy on a long term basis so the gradually increasing firmness approach seems right. I’m sure Shawn will have some great suggestions for me and the fact that the mattress layers can be shuffled around is a huge plus.
I’m not sure exactly where you are but just in case you haven’t seen this … post #2 here (which includes Savannah) may have some options that are close to you.
