Hi wheezer,
The first goal is of course some education (to offset the general misinformation that you will encounter) and then the next goal is to connect with better retailers or manufacturers in your area. In some areas the choices for mattresses that are “safe” by more critical standards are more limited or not great value and then an online purchase from a manufacturer where you have the ability to make changes after the purchase can make sense as well. Post #21 here has some of the best options I’m aware of if this is the direction you end up choosing.
Some of the better options and possibilities I know of in the Baltimore area are in post #2 here.
And no … you’re not “nuts” … but you do have a difficult challenge that others don’t have to face (just like some people have to avoid bee or wasp stings because they can be life threatening and others just take reasonable precautions and others yet don’t seem to think about it at all).
So at least you have some good sources of information and if you have questions along the way feel free to post them here. With complex and more “difficult” subjects … then one step at a time until the pieces start falling into place is usually the “best” way to go.
Phoenix
PS: I switched this reply from the other thread with the same post (and removed the links which I realized I had already given you).