Need recommendations/guidance

I have several general questions that I’m hoping for help with.

Background: I’m 5’9" 370 lbs, back sleeper primarily, but will shift to side or stomach when I get too hot. My wife is 5’7" 125 lbs, mostly side or stomach sleeper. With such a difference in size and sleeping position, I’m concerned about finding something that works for both of us.

We are currently on a King Beautyrest Black Hybrid (Clermont model) purchased at Mattress Firm about 5.5 years ago. The store model was incredibly comfortable for 5-10 minutes, but when we got it home it’s been far too soft and sleeps super hot. A Beautyrest rep recently told me that one of the foams they used in that model proved too soft and didn’t hold up, so they’ve discontinued use of that particular foam. I’m sure my size didn’t help either. It’s currently dipping pretty far around the hips and is hell on my back.

Prior to this I had (when single) a Serta interconnected spring with 2" memory foam eurotop I got from Sam’s Club. It was great for about 10 years until I wore it out. But now we’d like something with more motion isolation.

I recently learned that our Beautyrest Hybrid is sagging enough to qualify for a warranty claim. If I can get them to accept it, I’ll get a voucher for about $3,000 from Mattress Firm. After much reading, I’d rather not buy from them again, but not sure it makes sense to walk away from that much money.

So I’ve been in MF a couple times, and I’m drawn to a couple mattresses. I’ve laid on several others (Serta, Sterns, Beautyrest, Tempurpedic) and below are my favorite two at the moment. I’d like opinions/recommendations if you’re willing.

First is the Beautyrest Beyond Medium (medium was suggested due to wife side-sleeping). They appear to also have a “Beyond Hybrid” with some different layers and for significantly more expensive, but for the life of me I don’t understand why the non-hybrid model isn’t considered a hybrid. The non-hybrid model has 4.5" of various foams and a 0.5" latex layer above the springs. I could get this model for about $600 above my voucher ($3600 total). I’m concerned that I will have a similar experience to my current mattress…comfortable in-store, but miserable at home. My back can’t take 5-10 more years of that. And would it hold up to my size? I expect it to wear more quickly, but would be nice not to drop $4k every few years if it can be avoided. Also would be nice to have something that sleeps cooler, as heat has been an issue.

Second is the Tempurpedic Medium Hybrid (again due to side-sleeping). This one would be significantly more expensive…$3600 after voucher ($5100 for mattress, $1500 for base, minus voucher). This was initially the most comfortable/pressure relieving mattress we laid on. I like a little bounce response from the springs for…activities. I’m worried about the foam breaking down under my weight, and about sinking in and sleeping hot. Also by comparison, we have a Casper BIAB from Costco in our guest room, and it’s firm enough to hurt my hips and cause pressure points in other ways (though it may not be broken in enough). So here the decision is if this bed is worth another large investment, and if it’s likely to hold up.

Given everything I’ve read, if the MF warranty claim wasn’t in play, I’d probably build my own mattress. That way I could make sides for my wife and I, and dial it in to our preferences. I could also change out materials as they wear out. But I’d likely lean toward more latex to hold up longer.

A final note, as much as I like the idea of a split king, we have a co-sleeping 1yo that we don’t want getting stuck in the crack, so I need a non-split model.

So, forum experts, what would you suggest? Is there a bed I’ve missed? What’s the best way to utilize the store credit and help a sleep-mismatched couple be comfortable? Thank you for reading!

When choosing a mattress for my wife and me a couple of months ago, I used the general guidelines from this site Best Mattresses for Couples With Different Preferences | Perhaps you will find it helpful, too. But we settled on the Helix Dusk Luxe Mattress - probably the best mattress I’ve ever laid on. It is also worth noting that it completely satisfied my wife and me.
But from experience, I can tell that nobody can advise a mattress which will be suitable for you on all 100%. It is better to go to a store (possibly more than one or two) and try a mattress personally, so you will likely find a mattress that will satisfy you both.

Hi Willofva.

While a split configuration would be my first recommendation per you and your partners differing needs, I understand why that’s not an option for you at the moment.

As Rococco mentioned, “I can tell that nobody can advise a mattress which will be suitable for you on all 100%. It is better to go to a store (possibly more than one or two) and try a mattress personally, so you will likely find a mattress that will satisfy you both.”

It is really hard to give meaningful commentaries in terms of what someone may find satisfactory, but we can always happily comment on durability of a brand when specifications are available.

If you were to do a DIY, you could do a “hidden” split where you have a uniform comfort layer, a split support layer, and a uniform or split base layer depending on needs. This way there’s no gap to worry about in the comfort layer.

So you could have a medium latex comfort layer, a firm support layer, and an extra firm base on your side and on your partner’s side, it could be medium, medium, firm. Everything would be housed in a single encasement eliminating further the issue of any sort of gap between the foam in the mid and base layers. Of course, foam feel would ultimately be based on testing and real life data points.

I know it’s not in your list of options from MF but you may find the Ghost SmartBed worth a gander.