Hi Caribee4me,
Both of the mattresses you are looking at use good quality materials so there are no obvious weak links in either mattress. The Nexgel has an inch of quilting foam which is within the guidelines I usually recommend where foam softening wouldn’t have a significant effect on the mattress and the polyfoam layer on the very bottom is a stabilization layer that wouldn’t be subject to the stresses of sleeping so it would not affect durability either. The Beautiful is all Talalay latex with no polyfoam. In cases like this … the simple answer to your question about which is best has less to do with the materials and more to do with which provides you with the best PPP (Pressure relief, Posture and alignment, and personal preferences).
The most accurate way to know this is to test each one specifically for pressure relief and alignment and any of the other preferences you can “feel” (see post #46 here) for at least 15 minutes, fully relaxed, in all your sleeping positions.
This article will help you test for pressure relief (which is fairly straightforward) and this article along with post #11 here will help you test for alignment. The other preferences you can feel (such as motion isolation) are also fairly straightforward (as long as both of you test the mattress together).
Once you have compared both mattresses for your needs and obvious preferences … then you can compare the other pros and cons of each mattress and the retailer you are buying it from (both are an important part of the “value” of each mattress. Because all the materials are good quality … the real difference between them would be which one best matches the needs and preferences of each of you separately and together.
Both of them would be considered fairly soft (they don’t list the ILD and “soft” can be relative but the softer layers are fairly thick) so I would pay particular attention to alignment on both mattresses. If for example your hips sink down too far it could hyper-extend the hip joint (so it was outside of its neutral position) and this could contribute to your pain. the “key” with the thickness and softness of comfort layers is “just enough” to isolate you from the firmness of the firmer support layers in all your sleeping positions and with slight movement but no more than necessary so you aren’t too far removed from the firmer support which can “stop” your heavier parts from sinking down too far. When people are subject to pressure issues … there can be a tendency to shop for comfort and pressure relief only and pay less attention to spinal and joint alignment which are just as important.
You are correct that softer layers are less durable than firmer layers but in the case of the NexGel there are several layers of material above the soft latex which would be absorbing much of the constant compression. Layers that are deeper in the mattress would be more durable than layers that are closer to the surface so this wouldn’t be a particular concern at your weights.
As far as doctors or chiropractor’s recommendations … these are just about marketing and nothing more. They are often paid endorsements. Doctors and chiropractors generally have no idea about which specific mattress may be more suitable for a particular person and tend to know less about mattresses and “fitting” them to people than good salespeople at a good manufacturer or sleep shop. They may understand that good alignment is important but most of them have little idea about the type of mattress that will produce good alignment for each individual or the differences between different materials.
I would also pay particular attention to how your hip feels to make sure that there is no subtle sign of pain that could be coming from the mattress (and could get worse if you sleep on it for longer which is probably part of the reason for the tossing and turning.
There is no right or wrong here … only how your body responds to each mattress … and how well you listen to what it is telling you when you are testing.
I think the biggest “mistake” people make when they are buying a mattress is that they don’t spend long enough “re- creating” their sleep environment and fully relaxing for at least 15 minutes (and longer is also fine) on each mattress they are seriously considering. For those that do this … their body will tell them more than most of the “theory at a distance” … at least for the qualities of a mattress that they can feel.
User reviews can sometimes be more misleading than helpful although they can help tell you about the knowledge and service of the retailer you are buying from. You can see some of my thoughts about reviews and which ones can be helpful and which ones can be misleading in post #44 here.
As you mentioned … mattress warranties are mostly useless and have no bearing on how long a mattress will last or when it may need to be replaced. I would put much more emphasis on the materials in your mattress than I would on the warranty itself. Most “defects” that are covered by a warranty show up early in the life of a mattress. Softening and loss of comfort and support are the biggest reason people need to replace a mattress and this will generally happen long before the warranty period is over. There is more about warranties in post #174 here.
One final thing to bear in mind that neither mattress may be the best value available to you (depending on local pricing and on how they compare to other local options) because while both of them would probably be better value than most mainstream manufacturers … if there are any local factory direct manufacturers close to you they may have better value yet and in many cases can fine tune their mattress construction to take your unique needs and preferences into account.
In terms of value comparisons between them … they both use good quality materials so if either is significantly more than the other, I would ask yourself if any performance difference between them justified the higher costs.
I would not become “attached” to any specific component or material because both of these are good quality and the most important difference between them is the one your body feels the most.
Hope this helps.
Phoenix