Too Firm Hip and Shoulder Pain / Too Soft Back Pain - please advise...

I have read the mattress information provided on this forum and find it very informative but I am still in need of help. My husband and I had a Dormia for 10 years and loved it except it started to sag so our lower backs hurt. They have gone out of business. I believe it was wool pillow top with talalay latex inside and may have had coils but unsure. We are in our 40s and my weight ranges 170-190lbs and my husband is around 220-230lbs. We are both ready to shed some pounds once we get some sleep. We are both side sleepers and I may roll over on my stomach at times. We have not slept good for over a year and I feel like I have aged 20 years. We ordered a Nectar mattress May 2018 and it was too firm so we sent it back plus it off-gassed so bad which I am sensitive to. Then we tried the Zenhaven and both sides were too firm. We read about the chemicals in mattresses and decided to go clean and we are still paying off our Latex Serenity Savvy Rest. We did the Latex exchange and it is past 90 days now so we are stuck with this high quality, expensive mattress that we so much wanted to love. We have contacted Savvy Rest and they just recommend switching the layers and even purchased more for $500 each. We are mattress broke. We have changed out the layers in all configurations to include: Dunlop Firm/Dunlop Medium/Dunlop Soft/Talalay Medium/Talalay Soft (not in this order). Nothing has worked for us as if it is softer we experience severe lower back pain and then if firmer severe hip and shoulder pain. We have decided Latex is not for us and wish we cold sell this bed.

We desperately need another mattress and we are thinking about the Nest Bed Alexander Signature Hybrid, Brentwood Oceana, Helix Midnight Luxe vs Sunset Luxe.

Questions: Are you familiar with the Dormia (purchased in 2007) we had slept on (wish I had kept the specs) and if so, what is closest to this bed?

What beds do you recommend for side sleepers? Any of the beds I listed?

I know that the only way to see what is right for me is to try it out for the best PPP, but I would like you to lead us in the right direction. I just want to sleep without pain. We both have arthritis and I have degenerative disk ds of my neck. Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you so much for this forum!