Cool mattress for side sleepers - Confused by information overload

Talk To The Experts
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Wife and I are in the market for our first King. We have a 13 year old Stearns & Foster Queen that’s in good shape, but we’re long overdue for a King.

About Us: Both side sleepers. We’re mid 30’s and both healthy – I’m 5’9 / 135 lb, she’s 5’4 / 120 lb. Wife gets very hot at night (even w/ AC at 70 and the fan on), and need a cool mattress. We prefer a more soft/plush mattress. Wife is, um, “well endowed” and gets back pain sometimes from that.

Budget is not an issue. We’ll pay for quality if it’s worth it, but would rather not overpay for no reason. We’d rather have a $1k bed than a $5k bed and not waste money if it won’t affect our lives, but if the $5k bed is going to make our lives better, we’re willing to pay. We can always find deals on more expensive mattresses.

A couple days ago, we did an initial trip to some stores to get our research started. First went to a Mattress Firm store and tried both traditional coil mattresses (particularly S&F) and foam / hybrid mattresses (particularly Tempurpedic). The Tempurpedics felt way more comfortable, and the salesman said that if we need something cool, most of the Tempurpedics would be too hot and we should go for the LuxeBreeze series which he said has special breathable fabric. The LuxeBreeze 13" soft was the one we liked best.

We also went to Purple, Sleep Number and Casper stores. We hated Purple; the rubber stuff just didn’t seem comfortable to us. Sleep Number we found confusing and gimmicky; we just want a bed that we like, and don’t want to have to worry about finding some number. At Casper, we liked the Snow Max the best, which we were told is the only model they have that’s both soft and for cooling. (I’m concerned that Casper is all garbage that’s well marketed.)

Got home and started doing more research and saw a lot of stuff online about how memory foam mattresses are supposedly not good for, um, “intimacy” (i.e., the person on the bottom sinks in and it’s impossible to move). Neither of us thought about that when in any of the stores; go figure. Intimacy is certainly something to consider, and now I’m wondering what to make of this info and whether we should rule out all memory foam mattresses on the basis of this or whether it’s no big deal.

In my research, I also learned about latex – which we’d never heard of and we’ve never even tried. Latex seems good in that it’s cooling. But it seems bad in that one person can supposedly easily feel the other person move. We sometimes wake each other up tossing/turning or getting out of bed before the other, and we’d really like to minimize that. At this point, we should probably go to a store and try a latex bed to see if we even like it.

Any advice on where to go from here? Should we further consider the Tempurpedic LuxeBreeze we liked? Should we consider other memory foam options, and which ones? Should we consider latex options, and which ones?

Also, as far as adjustable bases… are these worth the money? are they gimmicky? We tend to shy away from technology and gadgets because they overcomplicate things, they break, they distract from the quality of the product itself, etc.

Thank you very much for any help!

@DLX
@EngineeredSleep
@Sleep_EZ
@TheCleanBedroom
@Arizona_Premium

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Hi Lax_Esq,

Welcome to the MattressUnderGround family and becoming an affectionately know MUGster.

Your scenario requires a bit more than a simple response, which why I added the @ symbol as a prefix to a few selected Trusted Members of the MattressUnderGround. I will happily respond later if on the TM experts do not get to you first.

I am happy to experience and see past some of the “marketed mattress brand companies” really put out more hype than mattress quality, which you can read about in our MattressUnderGround tutorials.

A quick word on some viscoelastic memory foam (temperpedic foam) and temperature claims. You need read the fine print on temperpedic claims to “sleep cooler” or “sleep 10 degrees cooler” advertising.
The fine print

++ LuxeBreeze® feels up to 10 degrees cooler based on the average heat index increase of TEMPUR-LuxeBreeze® compared to TEMPUR-ProAdapt® models measured over an 8-hour period. ProBreeze® feels up to 5 degrees cooler based on the average heat index increase of TEMPUR-ProBreeze® compared to TEMPUR-ProAdapt® models measured over an 8-hour period.

They claim that one specific mattress sleeps cooler than another model they offer. However, their advertising and sales teams often imply that the mattress provides a cool sleeping experience superior to what you may be accustomed to.

When it comes to airbeds, there are considerable better choices out there than SN. Isense, Airpedic, Nautica Home Wisteria are air mattress combinations, and the Isense premier hybrid air mattress all offer better systems and more modifiable mattress sections than the heavily marketed SN.

I will skip over the latex section for now as the stereotype you have research may lack a little needed information that the TMs are sure to provide.

Insofar as adjustable bases. There can be a myriad of health benefits for some, mobility benefits and a host of comfort benefits in addition to foundational support support benefits when the right adjustable base is selected, that will actually enhance the features of the mattress selected.

Hopefully,

This will give you a little food for thought as we can dive deeper into this.

Maverick

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Hi Lax_Esq - welcome to the Mattress Underground!

We offer many latex beds (also hybrids and innerspring models) so would like to offer up information.
Most of the people we talk to indicate the latex beds are quieter and reduce motion transfer (and I’ve found that to be the case personally as well). That may be partially because our latex beds have split layers in king size, except for the top layer, so motion does not transfer as much. I’d encourage you to try the latex. If you like a more ‘cushioning’ feel (you mentioned softer) then latex may feel good to you.

In terms of sleeping cool - you probably already know this, but your bedding influences this as much or more than your mattress. Natural fibers will breathe more than synthetics, helping you to sleep cooler.

We suggest adjustable beds for health reasons as elevating head and/or feet even slightly can be quite helpful. Some people find the technology helpful, to be able to remember their favorite positions, have lighting underneath the bed that helps them if they have to get up in the night or lower the bed efficiently to a flat position.

A few blog posts on our site that you may find helpful:

How to sleep cool (geared to heat waves, but you may find a few tips helpful)

Eight Health Benefits of Adjustable Beds

Buying a latex mattress: FAQs

Best of luck to you in your search! Give us a call if we can help.

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I can relate having a wife with similar features and is of the age where the hot flashes come and go. Neither of us can sleep on memory foam and especially Tempurpedic. My wife soaked one head to foot at a hotel and that was the first and last time we every slept directly on memory foam. Now we take a 2" Talalay latex soft topper with us whenever we are staying in a hotel. This provides both air flow and extra comfort since we are both side sleepers.

Who ever said latex was bad for motion transfer doesn’t know what they are talking about. I often have to look over to see if my wife is in the bed or not and visa versa. If you put any mattress on conventional box springs the whole thing is going to jiggle but if you put latex on a solid base or adjustable bed you won’t have that issue. Latex is the way to go in so many ways. It’s configurable in firmness for each side, it breathes, it’s non toxic and very durable. Our designs allow you to rotate and flip the top layer to add even more durability to the mattress. That being said I would put a latex mattress at the top of your list. Our price for King is around $2000 delivered so do your self a favor and search around your local area for a latex mattress to get a better idea of what I am describing.

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A lot to unpack here. We’ll try to address everything, but let us know if we missed anything or if you need further clarification.

We understand that buying a mattress is tough. It’s based on anecdotal information and small sample sizes. The challenge is that a person of similar build and age can have a totally different experience than others of similar build and age. One person says it is too soft and kills their back, while another says it is the best mattress. So, how do you know if it will work for you? Let’s dive into it.

Let’s start with sleeping warm. Memory foam typically sleeps hotter because you are more enveloped in it. Since you sink more into it, the material wraps around you, causing less airflow and thus sleeping hotter. Plus, memory foam is denser, so it has less airflow and tends to sleep warmer.

Keep in mind, along the same lines, that the softer the mattress, the warmer it will sleep regardless of material. The firmness of a mattress can indeed affect how warm it sleeps. Softer mattresses tend to sleep warmer because they envelop you more, reducing airflow around your body. On the other hand, firmer mattresses have fewer points of contact with your body, allowing for better airflow and a cooler sleep experience. For example, a firm latex mattress will sleep cooler than a soft latex mattress. However, there is a tradeoff in terms of comfort based on personal preferences regarding the feel.

Similarly, 2.5-pound memory foam will sleep cooler than 4-pound memory foam because it is less dense and has a little more airflow.

In terms of differences between materials, latex, being more resilient and buoyant, allows you to sleep more on the mattress rather than in it, which can help with cooling. Memory foam, conversely, tends to wrap around you and can sleep warmer.

These considerations only account for sleeping cooler and don’t take into account the comfort and feel, which are highly personal and very subjective.

Based on our experience, cooling fabrics have little impact on the coolness of the mattress. They will feel cool initially, but the effect fades in minutes or hours unless you roll to another spot on the mattress during the night. Additionally, if you use a mattress protector and then sheets, the impact of the cooling is negated.

There are many factors beyond the mattress that impact sleeping hot. The mattress protector, sheets, blankets, and comforter all play a role. A duvet is going to sleep a lot hotter than a thin blanket because there are more layers above you to insulate and trap heat. Personally, we got a new comforter, and my mattress never slept hot before, but now I wake up every night sweating and nothing else has changed.

Plus, the humidity in the room can be a factor, requiring some people to get a dehumidifier to help with the issue.

For those who sleep hot, they might need to use additional solutions. We’ve heard people have success with items like the BedJet, Chilipad, and Eight Pod, but we don’t have first-hand experience. It might be worth looking into at least.

Unfortunately, there isn’t a simple, one-size-fits-all answer. It is an iterative process for those who always sleep hot, and there isn’t a quick, simple solution because your mileage may vary.

I’ve already overcomplicated sleeping warm, but I’ll take a less deep dive on memory foam and intimacy. The notion that memory foam is bad for intimacy is a generic catch-all that isn’t 100% accurate. It is a bit more nuanced. It depends on the type of memory foam, thickness, and other materials used in the construction. In general, the old-school Tempurpedic with slow-recovery memory foam and a solid foam base aren’t great, but modern hybrid mattresses with faster-recovery memory foam can be just fine and typically not an issue for most people in terms of intimacy.

Latex is good at motion transfer, but memory foam is better.

As for adjustable bases, they can be a gimmick or add value. For people who need to sleep with their head slightly raised for acid reflux or other issues, the ability to slightly raise the head or foot makes it worth it. For those who like to read or watch TV in bed, it is a matter of personal preference rather than a matter of right or wrong. Personally, I’d rather sit up with a couple of pillows than an adjustable base. The massage feature is a gimmick—it’s vibration, not a massage.

I think one of the challenges with buying a mattress is that the answers are a bit nuanced, not simple, and vary from person to person, making it hard to give a generic or simplified answer.

We often look for the next best thing when buying a new mattress. As the old adage goes, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. If the Stearns and Foster mattress has served you well, stick with a similar style mattress. If you know the model name and firmness, we might be able to suggest one of our mattresses that will suit you or point you in a different direction. This is a key takeaway: stick with what works. Even if the mattress hasn’t felt good for the last month or year, we often forget the previous eight years or so when it was comfortable. In that case, stick with that style of mattress.

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Thanks for all the great responses so far. It’s a lot of info to take in, and this all has been super helpful. Based on the responses so far, I think we really need to go to a store and try out latex to see if it’s even something we like and worth further considering.

On the subject of latex, what do folks think of the Saatva Zenhaven Latex? Not sure what to make of these fancy boutique brands and whether they’re all just marketing.

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It’s unlikely that Trusted Members will provide much response to your question, as they generally refrain from being critical of their competitors.

However, as someone who is not a Trusted Member ™ of TMU and an expert moderator, I can offer some insights. The ZenHaven mattress is notable for being non-spring and dual-sided, featuring latex for support and comfort. It employs a zoned comfort system, which can be comfortable for some but less so for others. Priced at $3600 for a king size, it stands out in the market as an average at best mattress at a higher price point in its class.

It’s important to note that the responses you’ve received highlight great mattresses, but focusing on non-hybrid or spring options could allow you to engage directly with Trusted Members who can personally guide you through customization to meet all your needs, rather than relying on potentially embellished marketing claims from other brands that are marketing companies acting as mattress manufacturers.

Building on DLX’s advice, if your current mattress works well, there’s no need to change that concept when searching for a new one, although you may find that newer versions are not built to the same specifications that your existing model was constructed.

However, exploring alternatives might also enhance your sleep comfort. CozyPure provides a comparison chart where they benchmark their mattress (around $2300) against others like and including ZenHaven. While this comparison doesn’t definitively establish superiority, it does offer valuable spec insights, which are often lacking from brands like Saatva.

Additionally, considering the ease of adjustment with a zippered cover could outweigh the hassle and cost associated with returning a mattress that doesn’t meet your expectations. You may find comfort in a variety of mattresses. Saatva included.

I will leave you with this to ponder: whom would you trust more – a marketing company presenting itself as a mattress manufacturer, or a genuine mattress manufacturer working directly with you to tailor the perfect comfort for both you and your partner?

You would be best served, making a couple of local road trips and try the various options out there, that were not on your radar before, focusing less on the marketing hype and more on “what’s inside” while doing some comparison at home on the computer.

You may feel more at ease taking a step back, reading independent reviews, not from paid review sites, and compare mattresses layer by layer, feature by feature.

Trusted Members here are deeply invested in your satisfaction and comfort. They treat each interaction as a client relationship, prioritizing personalized care over the impersonal approach often associated with larger conglomerates. This personal touch fosters a genuine commitment to ensuring your needs are met and your experience is exceptional, aiming to earn your trust and positive recommendations through their dedicated service.

Good luck on your search, it can be confusing at points, but when all the dust settles you find yourself coming up with logical well thought out answers and will be able to narrow down to a select two are three.

Maverick

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So, we tried latex. We went to a local mattress store that had 5 different latex or latex hybrid mattresses from the Jamison brand (which the sales guy made a big deal of being used by Marriott). The only ones we somewhat liked were: 1) a hybrid that was a coil mattress with a 3" latex pillowtop that was $2000; and 2) 14" all-latex model that was $5000. #2 was supposedly the softest all latex and it wasn’t that soft, and #1 was actually softer – but it really isn’t a latex bed though.

We liked the idea of latex generally and think that might be our best option… if we can find one soft enough. The motion transfer on latex is really good; we could barely feel each other move. And it seems like latex will be much cooler than foam.

So at this point I think we want to try to find a latex model that’s soft enough. We’re not sure where to go from here. We’d ideally like to try before we buy but it just doesn’t seem like you can try many latex options in person these days. Seems like we’re going to need to gamble and buy something online and hope for the best.

Thoughts on how to proceed from here? Does it sound like latex will work for us, and recs for a soft enough latex?

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Where you’re located? There might be someone nearby that you are unaware, who has a range of latex options for you to try out first.

You might find it helpful to take this body profile quiz offered by @CST. They have a high success rate in pinpointing the right combination for customers.

@CST specializes in fully customizing all-latex mattresses, even segmenting each sleeper and section of the body. They are more expensive due to their extensive customization options but it may be worth a look, which you can explore here. It’s worth looking into for a different perspective on your preferences and finding the perfect match.

Additionally, the manufacturers who have already responded on this thread have proven to be skilled in identifying suitable combinations, getting it right over 90% of the time.

Dealing with experts who can build a mattress from scratch sets them apart from those who modify pre-constructed ones.

Maverick

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Thanks for all the help. We’re in Tampa. Let me know if there’s anything possibly nearby to try a range of options.

I think dealing with an expert who can customize or semi-customize a mattress may be our best option. Though, it seems like a fairly big investment of time and money to get something and try it out… if it doesn’t work out.

We do each like the feeling of sinking into the mattress. Is a even soft latex mattress going to give us that?

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So it is a 2 hour drive, but @foxmattress fox mattress is one of the best at manufacturing a custom mattress to your exact specifications in the Florida area. These guys sleep, live and breath custom mattress matching.

You certainly can work with any of the TMs who ship nationwide and offer trial periods.

City Mattress in Cape Coral carries the Prana Mattress. They make an all latex mattress in a variety of firmness levels. I have heard very mixed reviews regarding the mattress brand, but it will give you an opportunity to test an all latex mattress if you are inclined to take the hour and a half ride.

That should get you started if you are inclined to take a little road trip.

Maverick

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So, I spoke to a number of makers today who ship nationwide. I’m a bit more informed and it’s still very confusing and I’m interested in some neutral advice.

For example, I’m not sure which layers we’d want Dunlop vs Talalay. Some companies only deal in Dunlop and don’t sell Talalay; others vice versa; some mix and match. Since we want soft, I think anyone who only uses only Dunlop should be eliminated. Some companies recommend Talalay for the top layers and say Dunlop is better for the bottom layers for more support and longevity and say there’s no advantage of Talalay all the way through. Others say Talalay is just superior than Dunlop and it’s better to go all Talalay, or they don’t even sell Dunlop. I’m really not sure who to believe on this one.

Also, most companies seem to think there’s no reason for us to get a 12/13" versus a 9/10" as, at our body weights, we don’t feel a difference with the extra layer. I was thinking an extra layer would make it more comfortable. Is it pointless to get an extra layer?

Is there any advantage of buying a pre-made 100% latex mattress from a company where all the layers are glued and sealed in the cover, as opposed to the companies where they just send you all the layers and you assemble it yourself?

And among the “TM” companies where you just are essentially buying the individual layers and the cover, is one company’s product really the same as the next? Is it just a question of service, exchange policy, warrant, etc.?

Thank you so much!

@Arizona_Premium
@Sleep_EZ
@TheCleanBedroom

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Hi Lax_Esq and welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out on this! I hope you don’t mind if I chime in on this.

Regarding Talalay and Dunlop, and I normally recommend Talalay for the top layer and Dunlop for the rest of the layers, and neither one is better than the other, neither one is softer or firmer than the other, and neither one has more or less chemicals than the other, etc. There is a noticeable difference between Talalay and Dunlop, and it’s not really that Talalay is softer than Dunlop. Most people and companies say Talalay is softer just because that’s an easier way to explain it. You can actually have a soft Dunlop layer that’s softer or firmer than a soft Talalay and a medium Talalay that’s softer or firmer than a medium Dunlop, etc. The real difference comes down to how they react when being compressed. Talalay is bouncier and springier and is generally better at contour and pressure relief on your hips and shoulders. Dunlop is denser and is generally better at support and maintaining proper spinal alignment so our most common configuration is Talalay for the top layer and Dunlop for the bottom 2 layers. We will recommend Talalay for two or more layers for customers that have things like fibromyalgia, shingles, chronic hip pain, chronic shoulder pain, or anything where they’re sensitive to pressure, or for customers that just prefer a bouncier / springier feel. Outside of those circumstances, a combination of Talalay and Dunlop offers the best chance to be successful for the average person. Again, the best way I can summarize the differences would be to say that Talalay is better at pressure relief on your hips and shoulders and Dunlop is better at maintaining proper spinal alignment and avoiding back pain. However, Talalay can also be helpful in avoiding back pain because it provides more of what we call secondary support. Secondary support fills in the gaps between your body and the mattress. For side sleepers, this is normally the area between a person’s ribs and waist. For back sleepers, this is normally the area between the small of your back and the mattress. If these parts or your body aren’t being held up by the mattress, your muscles will work all night to hold those parts of your body up, which can lead to back pain. Aside from that, women tend to be curvier, especially around their hips, and having a top layer of Talalay can help avoid hip pain and keep the mattress from pushing their hips up, which can also lead to back pain. As such, most of our customers definitely benefit from having one layer of Talalay on top, and Dunlop for the rest of the mattress, but it’s completely up to you what you would like to order.

9" of latex is more than enough for anyone under 300 pounds, so a 12" or 13" mattress isn’t a better mattress, it’s just a taller mattress.

There are tons of benefits to a layered & unglued mattress over just one giant mattress with all the components glued together. Layered mattresses are (normally) fully customizable, meaning you can order the mattress to be as soft or as firm as you’d like. They’re also fully adjustable, meaning you can change the softness, firmness, back support, pressure relief, etc. AFTER you get the mattress in your home. To be more specific, the 10” is our most popular, and these mattresses normally go out with three 3" layers of different firmnesses - normally the softest layer (or the cushion & contour layer) is on top and the supportive layers are on the bottom. This helps ensure our customers get the right balance of contour for their hips and shoulders but also support for their lower back. If you start with a certain setup and find that it’s too soft, you can unzip the cover and rearrange the layers to get a firmer feel out of the mattress, or you can exchange a layer to make it softer. Additionally, latex mattresses typically last 20 years. If, in 5 or 10 or 15 years you decide you want a softer or firmer mattress you would only have to buy a new layer instead of an entirely new mattress. Lastly, if the mattress starts to break down in 15 – 20 years, it’s normally the top layer that breaks down first, and at that point you can likely just buy a new top layer of latex instead of a whole new mattress and get an additional 8-10 years out of the mattress.

When it comes to latex, there are only 2 companies in the world that make Talalay latex and a handful that make Dunlop latex, so the materials are more or less the same across manufacturers. However, we’ve had decades-long relationships with all of the major latex manufacturers on the planet, and they normally not only give us very good prices, we normally take priority when they manufacturers’ stock gets low, so if there’s ever a shortage in latex, we’re normally still very well supplied. Aside from that, the manufacturers know our stringent requirements for quality control and customer service, and the warehouse managers normally oversee our orders personally to make sure we only get their highest quality latex.

Aside from all that, warranty policy, return policy, exchange policy all make a difference, and reputation for customer service makes a difference as well.

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So, we got a mattress with 3" soft talalay, 3" medium talalay, and 3" firm dunlop.

Wife found it incredibly firm and was having lots of lower back pain. I think it’s fairly comfortable but not as plush as I’d like.

The seller recommended that wife take my medium talalay and use it as her bottom layer. So she’s now got 3" soft talalay, 3" medium talalay, 3" medium talalay. She’s been using this for 3 days and while we’ll give it another week, she thinks it’s really comfortable and hasn’t been having back pain.

Is this such a soft mattress config that it’s inherently bad either for her health for the mattress long term?

Thank you!

@Sleep_EZ

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No that should be just fine! There’s no wrong way to set up the mattress, as long as she’s comfortable

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