Sorry this is very LONG! Advice needed please!
I’ve been l reading posts this summer as my husband and I have been trying to figure out what to do about our Berkeley Ergonomics bed. I have had upper back and neck pain (soreness and stiffness in muscles, not actual spine) for about a year, and finally think it must be the bed. I’ve seen doctors, gone to months of physical therapy, had weekly massage, changed my pillow many times and still not much relief. I’ve slept on the floor, my daughter’s hard bed, a futon, etc. The harder surfaces are not good for me sleeping on my side either and I can’t sleep on my back. There is no medical cause for the pain and I’m in otherwise in good health. The pain is worst on the left side of my neck and upper/mid back, especially about halfway down left side, though I’m sore and stiff on both sides (traps, rhomboids etc). Massage therapist told me I’m extremely tight on left side (but I sleep on my right). I wake up with pain being worst and it gets somewhat better through day but never goes away (esp stiff/sore neck).
We have a 6 year old 8 inch BE talalay latex mattress on euro slats (which we’ve adjusted many different ways beyond what the store initially recommended, and we’ve even tried putting mattress right on the floor). The 6 inch core is medium non zoned talalay latex, top comfort layer is split with the side I sleep on being 2 inch soft, my husband’s is 2 inch firm. From the start I haven’t felt this bed was comfortable (has always felt too firm to me, though the soft side is softer and feels comfortable when I first lay on it). The salesman rejected my initial dislike as being adjustment issues after it was delivered (when we called about the comfort problems I initially had) and it was eventually tolerable for me so I’ve lived with it. Unfortunately the store we bought it from went belly up during COVID so we have no recourse now. The firm comfort layer was supposed to be my side but I hated it so much my husband swapped with me. I knew little about latex at the time, (but I really wanted and still do want a non toxic bed ) and now realize the salesman probably shouldn’t have sold me a firm comfort layer. We are both side sleepers. I am 130, 5-5 curvy, husband is 155, 5-11. He also occasionally has low back problems. I’m guessing the firm layer isn’t too great for him (although he doesn’t usually wake up with pain).
My question is should we try replacing the comfort layer with new 2 inch latex from another supplier? Should it be soft talalay latex since we’re both side sleepers? Or since the support layer is medium talalay, should it be some other firmness and then topped with a mattress topper of soft talalay for comfort? There is no store that sells BE anywhere near where I live now so I don’t think getting replacement layers from BE is possible. I don’t want the feeling of the straight latex foam under the sheet. I like the feel of a true mattress top. I feel like the main problem could be that this bed is too firm for me, and I’m not getting enough depth for shoulder and hips (my waist is much smaller than both). I sort of want to trash the whole thing but we spent over $3K and six years seems ridiculous to need to already replace given that we are small people and latex is supposedly so durable.
Another big issue is that this bed sleeps extremely hot for me. I go to bed cold (room is very cool) but I wake up almost every night on fire (though my husband is freezing and has to use extra blankets), and we use no mattress protector, cotton sheets, and a thin cotton quilt. I am post menopausal but I’m on hormones and don’t have hot flashes any other time. I feel like the mattress just retains heat.
I’m even wondering if we need to punt and buy another type of bed like springs or hybrid that is cooler but I’m overwhelmed and paralyzed about with shopping for one, since there are no trustworthy (not big brand) retail outlets I can go to in person. I’ve read extensively (and warily) about all the online mattresses and we did test some out at a Sandman Sleep store (far away from where I live) back in the spring. I liked the Nest Owl but I’m unsure about the thick “quilting foam” l in the pillow top. Seems like it could get a body impression pretty easily and may be hot too.
So bottom line is it worth spending more $ on this bed or do we try to find something different. Is a 6 inch talalay core with a 2 inch comfort layer enough for two lighter side sleepers?
Thanks if you’ve read all the way to the end!
Any advice appreciated.