Hi sweetandsourkiwi.
You are welcome!
Sorry to hear that you find the Zenhaven mattress uncomfortable especially as you had such high expectations.
Of course, you could go with a DIY option if you have the inclination to experiment with this, but .but it seems that you have a bit of a learning curve ahead of you. Generally I would strongly suggest avoiding the temptation of trying to design your own mattress based on specs (either yours or a mattress) and instead work closely with the retailers and manufacturers that are of interest to you and use careful testing and feedback from your own body along with the expertise each of them has about their own mattresses to help you make your best choices. Your body doesn’t understand specs … only what I call PPP (Pressure relief, Posture and alignment, and Personal preferences).
The foams within a mattress are not fire retardant “doused” , in fact, some of the more green mattress options never use fire retardant chemicals. What is required is that a mattress pass the 16 CFR 1632 and 1633 fire regulations with or without the use of fire retardant chemicals (the method of passing the regulations isn’t specified in the regulations). The most common method used to pass the regulations is the use of inherent fire barrier fabrics that are either quilted into the cover or are wrapped around the inner materials of the mattress like a sock. There is a lot of misleading information in the industry about fire retardants and “chemicals” ranging from “fear mongering” on one side to completely minimizing fire retardants from being an issue at all on the other. Like most issues that arouse strong feelings or controversy, the most reliable and “accurate” information tends to be in between both polar extremes. Also encasing a mattress in a protector won’t stop the VOCs from being emitted
There is no scientific definition, yard stick, or unit measurement of plushness that is repeatable in any circumstances and using a precise rating of plushness (such as 4.5) across products with different materials from different manufacturers is very misleading and generally speaking meaningless as plushness or firmness is very personal and relative to the person that is doing the testing. This is also why you cannot expect that the Zenheaven to feel the same as the Talalay Bliss or any other mattress unless they use exactly the same materials and components.
As far as the non-toxicity goes “Toxic” is a term for poisonous substances produced within living cells or organisms, although the term is often used in the mattress industry (and often part of some “fear-mongering” campaigns), but I think I understand your point. Most people that are looking for “non-toxic” ( toxicity is dose-dependent ) materials are usually concerned most with “safety”.
There is quite a bit of confusing information available online about toxicity, safety and organic, and there is more about the different types of organic and safety certifications such as Oeko-tex, Eco-Institut, Greenguard Gold, C2C, and CertiPUR-US in post #2 here, and more about some of the differences between organic and safety certifications in post #2 here and there are also some comments in post #42 here that can help you decide whether an organic certification is important to you for environmental, social, or personal reasons, or whether a “safety” certification is enough, and what those certifications can mean to determine whether the contents of any particular mattress are “safe enough” for you.
Latex is generally able to meet more stringent standards for VOCs and harmful substances, and if you decide to move in that direction,
Your description shows that you are not sinking in as deeply as you would need to, and not that you are “not having support under your waist”. When you sink in more you often feel more pressure, which people often mistakenly label support. Deep support is maintaining a neutral spinal alignment which is preventing from bottoming out.
The fact that you felt better with the egg crate strip on top shows that you need a bit more plushness but again only you can determine the level of plushness you feel comfortable with.
A low return rate or what other people say won’t tell you much if anything about the suitability, quality, durability, or “value” of a mattress for any particular person (see post #13 here ), and I recommend that you avoid considering such comments as any sort of a reliable indicator of the appropriateness of any particular product for your needs. With any mattress purchase I would truly encourage you to focus on the product itself, quality of componentry and your own needs and preferences and not on what others may or may not feel on the same mattress. Reviews or other people’s comments can be very misleading
The clerk at the mattress mill is wise and listening to her body. You’ve only had the mattress one night - I’d strongly discourage you from making an assessment after only one night of sleeping on the product. All mattresses will soften slightly with use, even latex and the covering and the non-woven fabric wrapping the springs, although the amount will vary based upon materials being used. Your body will also go through a period of retrogression where you’ll adjust to the new product as well. Keep in mind that a mattress can take a few weeks (up to 90 days in some cases) to break in and a new mattress is almost always firmer than a mattress that has been in the showroom for a while and has gone though it’s initial softening period.
To begin with I would suggest that you give it more time and even if in the end the product turns out to be unsuitable, you can use what you learned with your future purchase. You’d be surprised how much you can learn while allowing for the adjustment and break in period.
It feels different from what you tried because in the store you tried Bliss and you ordered Zenhaven and unless all materials and construction are the same for both mattresses you won’t be experiencing the same feel. It may be that you won’t get used to it or that even after the product breaks in you will still find it uncomfortable, but in the process you would gain many insights of what is right for you for a future purchase, then I would do a hard reset and start from ground zero with evaluating the specifics of the componentry of any mattress that you are considering such as materials used, layers, and thickness, ILDs. When assessing any product, also be sure that you find out information listed here so you can compare the quality of the materials and components to the durability guidelines here to make sure there are no lower quality materials or weak links in a mattress that would be a cause for concern relative to the durability and useful life of a mattress before making any purchase.
I would certainly suggest to you to rely on the advice of the manufacturer themselves as they are much more familiar with their own mattress designs and materials than anyone else (including me) and they can use the information you provide them about your body type and sleeping positions, your preferences, your history on different mattresses, and the results of your local testing to make suggestions based on the “averages” of other customers that may be similar to you. The more accurate and detailed the information you provide them the better you will help them to help you make the best possible choices out of the options they have available. Of course the options you have available with each retailer or manufacturer (or with a particular mattress) and your ability to exchange layers or the mattress itself or use other forms of fine-tuning after your purchase or the return policy may also be an important part of your personal value equation or to offset the risk that can go with any online purchase.
If you need to start again I would still read through the mattress shopping tutorial herepost #2 here post #13 here (there is a condensed version of it at the end of that post) which includes all the basic information, steps, and guidelines that can help you make the best possible choice Two of the most important links in the tutorial that I would especially make sure you’ve read are which has more about the different ways to choose a suitable mattress (either locally or online) that is the best “match” for you in terms of “comfort”, firmness, and PPP that can help you assess and minimize the risks of making a choice that doesn’t turn out as well as you hoped for andwhich has more about the most important parts of the “value” of a mattress purchase which can help you make more meaningful quality/value comparisons between mattresses in terms of suitability (how well he will sleep), durability (how long he will sleep well), and the overall value of a mattress compared to your other finalists based on all the parts of your personal value equation that are most important to you (including the price of course and the options you have available after a purchase if your choice doesn’t turn out as well as you hoped for).
I hope that this is only about the adjustment period and you won’t have to look for another product. Keep us posted.
Phoenix